My Mother's flowers
by Kitten1313
Summary: Omegaverse AU. He's never told anyone what happened, not everything anyway. But now Alfred has a person willing to listen to his story and no matter how painful it is he's going to let it be known what happened during the war...to him, his brother and most importantly his mother. (rated for swearing, rape, character death)(currently revising and editing)
1. Introduction

**"Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all the darkness."**

A thin blonde girl takes out her pen and pad of paper before scrolling for an app in her phone as she too places it on the table, "Sorry, normally I'm more prepared than this," the young beta smiles sheepishly at the much older Omega sitting across from her.

He chuckles warmly, blue eyes sparkling as he watches her finally find the recorder. "It's okay, but I don't see why you have to record this."

"Well, for future generations, mostly. So that a hundred years from now, they'll know what happened." She watches as her companion looks away. "It's important…"

He nods and runs a hand through his short golden hair, "I know it is, but what I'm going to tell you…I've never told anyone. At least not the entire story," he lets out a small sigh, taking off his glasses to clean off a spot the lens, "It's not a pretty one, and while I wish it was…not all stories are."

She can see that it's a painful subject by the look on the man's face. "I'm not looking for a fairy tale but the honest to god truth." She gets a warm laugh from the man, so she presses play on her app and clears her throat, "So, shall we get started?"

"Sure, why not? We have all night and I just made a big pot of coffee," the Omega stands and grabs a cup from the counter nearby, "You want one?"

"No, thank you. How about we start with your name?"

"Fine. My name is Alfred, and honestly, to tell you my story, I should really tell you my mother's first." He sits back down, instinctively touching the small golden cross that hung from his neck. "If you don't mind, that is. I know it's not why you're here, but it's important to me."

"No not at all. So, what was you mother's name?"

Alfred leans back in his chair, a tender smile lighting his face as he thinks of his mother. "Well, her name was Francoise but she always went by her middle name; Julia."

"Julia?"

"Yeah, Francoise Julia Bonnefoy." His mind wanders back to simper times, before the world had been torn apart and the innocent life he'd had in that small town had been forever changed. Now it all feels almost dreamlike, like none of it had ever happened, but he knows better. "I really don't to give you nightmares."

"Well, war's not always pretty-"

"War my fucking ass! They called it 'war' so they could justify what they did; so they could say they were right. Well, they can all kiss my ass. That's not saying there weren't real heroes-but I'm jumping ahead. I'll start at the beginning." He takes a moment to collect his thoughts before he speaks again, "Okay, I was born on July 4th along with my older twin brother Matthew..."


	2. Achilleas

My mother was a slender woman, short compared to my brother and I, but you didn't wanted to mess with her. Behind her hazel brown eyes was the soul of a lioness that would do anything for her young. From my earliest memories, her long brown hair ha always been braided neatly into a bun at top of her head with a rose or iris tucked behind her ear. I never understood how it stayed so neatly in her hair no matter what she was doing, but she always looked stunning.

I can't say much about my father. His name was Arthur Kirkland, that much I know. From what I remember he had had messy blonde hair and powerful jade eyes. He had been much shorter than my mother but had demanded respect from other Alphas despite always letting my mother have her way. Sadly, when I was only five, he had been out drinking with a few friends and the next morning he had been found bruised, bloody and ice cold in a nearby creek. They never found his killer, not that anyone had ever really looked.

Even at a young age, my brother and I both knew that our mother was heartbroken, but she tried so hard to never let it show. Late at night, however, we'd hear a muffled sob or whispered prayer for the Alpha she'd lost.

After his death, my mother went back to using her maiden name but she chose different last names for both of us. For years I had wondered why but I didn't have the nerve to ask until I was seventeen. I had found her in her usual spot in the garden and only after a long pause did she answer. "I want you two to grow up with names you can be proud of."

I looked down at her, confused, "But why those names, I mean what's so bad about being named Kirkland or Bonnefoy?" I didn't understand why she seemed so sad as she shook her head, "No, I've chosen your names and that's what they will stay." She then stood up and dusted herself off. "I want you two to grow up and find love," she said as she kissed the middle of my forehead. "Do you hear me, _mon ange_?"

"Yeah, Mom, I understand." She tapped my cheek lovingly before taking a few of her flowers inside, leaving me alone with my twin brother outside in the waning light.

"You don't understand at all do you?" Matthew said with a sigh that I knew all too well.

"No, I do understand," I replied as I picked up a daisy Mom had forgotten in the grass. "She wants us to be happy. She wants you to find an Omega and me an Alpha, but honestly I don't think I want one."

He chuckled warmly as he crossed his arms over his chest, "That might change after…" He stopped as he looked up at the sky above us. "If we survive what's-"

I stopped him instantly, "We will, man. It's like all those other times before when those assholes in charge decided to pick fights with each other." I put on what I hoped was my heroic smile as I tried to ease any doubts he had, not realizing at the time that all his fears were sound.

Matthew simply chuckled at me. Or, I should say, at the pose I then decided to strike, with the daisy tucked behind my earHe took it from me and played with it in his fingers as if lost in thought for a moment. and our birthday was just a few months away, but I could already tell what he was thinking. If war really was just around the corner, it would have meant Matthew might be called to fight. As the only Alpha in our household after my father's death, it would have been his duty if a draft was ordered.

At the time it was almost unheard of, but my Mother had refused to mate with anyone else. So if Matthew was to leave, what would have stopped any Alpha from swooping in and stealing either our mother or I away? Hell, we had been lucky so far, but that may have been because our mother was so fiery and headstrong. "It'll be over in a few months, if that, and besides, you know how much those Alphas like to puff out their chests." I laughed as I wrapped my arm around his broad shoulders. "They won't start too much shit."

He gave me a warm smile as he placed the daisy back behind my ear, "You know if Mama hears you swear like that she's going give you an earful."

I laughed as he lead me into the house, "Yeah, but it's true."

"Yeah…" He said quietly as if already lost in thought again. I flicked his ear lightly before I made a mad dash from my room on the second floor, it was a mix of brotherly and omega instants, I guess. Either way, I wanted to draw him out of any thoughts or worries he had at the moment. So, as he grabbed at my sweatshirt with a wicked glare in his eyes, I was happy. _We_ were happy but that would change quickly.

One week later, a bomb hit the west coast.

There were few survivors.


	3. Furzes

It's amazed me how fast the next few months when by. We were eighteen before we knew it and one afternoon we were at home while our Mother was out shopping for what she could get. Since the first attack, people started rationing things out of fear while panic took over and didn't stop. By the second attack that hit two months after the first the whole country was terrified and hysteric. If Mom was worried she never let it show unlike Matthew.

Matthew won't come out and say it; no he would just sigh when he watched the news or looked online. He was always a quiet guy but I could read him like a book. "Mattie…" I started that day after I turned off his computer much to his annoyance, "Come on Dude I know you're not thinking what I think you're thinking."

He sighed again at me as he tried to pull the laptop out of my hands. "Al, I'm going."

"Bullshit you're staying here." I said loudly as I held firm to the computer, "The war-"

"The war is here! The war is not going away! And this way they don't drag me out like they've done to our neighbors!" It had been a long time since he had raised his voice much less yell at me. Sure I had been saying the same thing for months now but I didn't realize how much it was getting on his nerves. "Al…"

I weakly smiled at him as I handed back his laptop. I wanted to say he was over reacting but I saw it first-hand what the government was doing. They had proposed a draft of sorts but really what they were doing was rounding up all the Alphas and male Betas they could find. A month before we witnessed a neighbor just down the street from us literally dragged from his house as the rest of the neighborhood gawked or hided. It was strange and almost surreal and while I wanted to go out and look, my mother stood in front of the door. It wasn't the first time nor would it be the last, soon it was going on all over the country and little was being done to stop it.

They said it was for our own good and that if Alphas would do their duty like they were supposed to they wouldn't have to go to these kinds of measures. "Mattie…" I finally said after a moment of awkward silence, "You know this isn't right."

"Yeah I know it's not but it's not like I really have much of a choice." He shook his head as he leaned up against the wall now with the computer left forgotten on a nearby chair. "I'll be home…"

"But what if you don't? And did you even bother asking Mom about this before going ahead and pulling this shit?"

"No I didn't."

"And why not? I mean she has a right to know that her kid's going off to war." We both knew why though it wasn't that hard to figure out. He couldn't because it would break her heart. "Did you sign up already?"

He looked away, "No not yet but I'm going to."

"When?"

"Alfred."

"No damn it I want an answer!" I stared at him locking my eyes with his and I wasn't going to back down. The only reason he blinked first was because the front door below us burst wide open. Instantly we both turned to the noise as our eyes widened in fear. I grabbed my pocket knife as Matthew closed and locked the door.

It only stopped the Alphas for a few minutes at best before they kicked in the door and pulled us out of the room. I sliced at one man before he yanked the blade from my hand and threw it back towards my brother's room, "Fucking Omega shit." He hissed out once he noticed his hand was bleeding.

My brother tried to pull away and get back towards me but they had him by the hair and half dragged half pushed him down the stairs and towards the front door. "Matthew Williams, congratulations you're now a member of the Army." The bulking Alpha that had him said. He had such a lustful smile on his face that it made me sick. He then turned back at me and all I saw was cold evil in his pure black eyes. "As for you, we could you a few Omegas here and there."

I swallowed hard as I kicked at the one holding me, "Kiss my ass!" I don't know why I said it but it only got me a swift kick to the groin.

"Shut up!" One shouted at me before stopping short at the Omega standing tall in the door frame, "Move." He commanded but my Mother wouldn't budge.

While they had more than a foot on her, she wasn't scared at all. "Let go of my sons." She growled back with pure hatred in her eyes. "You can't have them."

"Lady-"

"Alfred is an Omega and Matthew still has another month before he has to sign up for the draft so let them go!" She folded her arms as she glared at them like they were nothing but kids that trampled her rose bushes.

To my surprise the grip on my arm loosened slightly before I was suddenly pushed towards her causing me to land on my knees in front of her. "We're taking the other."

"He's too young."

"It's not up for discussion." The one holding Matthew said coldly. While the others around him folded slightly at the sight of my mother he on the other hand refused to give up his prize. "We need Alphas. He's an Alpha so he's now property of the government."

"Since when are we property?" She scoffed as she stepped forward into the house and past me; she was both shielding me as she slowly reached for Matthew. "Last time I checked I was no one's property."

Just as she was about to take Matthew's hand he, in a flash was pulled back and forced out the back door, "Well then you should ask your Alpha about that because you're dead wrong!" He pushed past her and out the door.

I was frozen in shock as my mother sprinted after my brother as she screamed out for him, "No! Give me back my Matthew!" But by the time she made it out the back door he along with the men that took him was gone. They sped away like cowards into the night and once again no one did a thing to stop them. They all stared for a moment before leaving my mother alone in her destroyed garden.

Slowly I joined her out among the trampled flowers she loved so much, I kneeled beside her and wrapped my arms around her smaller frame and let her sob into my shoulder. I didn't say a word as I stared at a smashed rose, I was mad at everyone and everything but the person I was most angry with was myself.

I always saw myself as a hero of sorts but now when the time finally came to show what kind of a hero I could be I failed. All I had to show for my lack of heroism was a bloody shirt, a sobbing mother, a missing brother…and a smashed rose.


	4. Sweet pea flowers

She could have cried, sank into a deep depression but my Mother stayed strong. While many around her whispered behind her back about the son she lost. She knew what they said didn't matter but to me they were bastards, they were no better than the men that took Matthew away, "Alfred, mon ange don't listen to them." She told me one night after I had threatened to beat up a shorter beta with an especially loud mouth. "They are trying to break you."

I muttered as I turned away, "They're bastards."

She took my jaw and pulled my face to meet her eyes, "Words are easy weapons. They cut deep and the pain can last longer than any bullet wound but only if you let them." She kissed my forehead, "But they're also weapons that can be justified and vindicated in the eyes of others so while you might have seemed in the right to others you were still in the wrong."

I blinked, "Wait…how can what he have said been vindicated? He…he." I couldn't tell her what he had said to me, it was cruel and honestly I didn't want her to know. I could still be a hero in a way and shield her from some of the pain I decided that I alone would bare.

"Life isn't black and white baby; there are a lot of gray areas." She smiled at me trying to get a point across that I was not getting. "They say I was stupid for standing in the way and for it they took Matthew. While others say Matthew was the Alpha therefore it was the government's rights but they don't want to see the truth or perhaps they fear that the truth would be too painful to see." I could see the pain she was trying to mask as she cleared her throat, "But it's not our job to force them to see it."

"But Mom they'll have to see it eventually. I mean if I ever have kids they'll learn about this shit in school like I learned about all the last three wars." It's how the world worked, I thought. If someone was attacked or abused than we would have to learn about it or threaten to repeat the action.

"History remembers it all but the Historians on the other hand like to pick and choose what they remember. Remember baby we all love the heroes and hate the villains but few know what exactly made them each that way." She always had such a way with words and I could tell she was trying to make me think of something deeper than what I wanted to. She must have known I was uncomfortable so she changed the subject, "Come on let's go pick a few flowers."

I didn't know if she was serious or not as she stood up and reached for my hand, "Mom…most of your flowers are kinda…you know."

"They're not dead. The roses will come back and the Black-eyed Susans will grow again and besides this house needs some color." What she wanted to say was it needed some color for when Mattie came home.

So I nodded as I took her hand and followed her out into the garden. I remember that the sky looked a bleak grey as a plane flew overhead. "Mom we need to get back inside." I said quickly pulling her back towards the house. The plane wasn't one of ours but an enemy fighter plane and we both knew what that meant as I ushered her inside our basement. It wasn't long before we heard the sound of gunfire and screaming above us.

I held her close as we hid under the basement steps, my heart was beating out of my chest as I heard the sound of distant explosions that shattered all the windows in our house and rocked us both to our cores. Our neighborhood was the front lines and the skies above were filled with planes fighting it out not caring if there were omegas or children below. "Alfred…" She whispered to me during a lull in fighting, "Once this is over we have to leave."

"Leave for where?" I answered hoping my voice didn't shake as I said it. I was honestly afraid, not of death but of somehow losing her.

"Your late father had a brother and he should be far enough away from the fighting for us to be safe." She said it as if he was simply in the next town over. "He's a good Alpha and he'll take us in."

It wasn't like this was something hidden from me, I did receive a birthday card here and there from a man named Scott Kirkland but it never registered exactly. I never meet him but he knew of me and my brother. "Are you sure? I mean where is he?" Both where good questions, I mean if he was an Alpha than why didn't he try to have more contact with us?

She nodded, "Yes I'm sure and he's in a small town just across the border."

"Whoa Mom that's what, a couple days drive?" What I didn't say was the border wasn't exactly like it is today. You couldn't just walk across it; you had to face a few crossing agents, these Alphas had complete say. If they didn't want you to cross the border than you didn't cross, period, and it could have been for the smallest of things.

"Yes but it'll be worth it to keep you safe." I knew she was willing to do anything to protect me. So the next day after the fighting stopped we emerged from the basement to see our windows blown out and our home a mess. Our car wasn't any better since it was actually hit by the gun fire. Five large holes littered it and it also refused to start so with little options left at the moment we loaded up two backpacks with what we would need and started walking north.

I wish we could have taken a train or a bus but then it might have gotten us killed, they were easy targets after all and it wasn't unheard of them being bombed. But Mom had faith and hope that we'd get there in no more than a few weeks besides we weren't the only ones making our ways to the border. We might have been refugees but a least we would have somewhere to go once we reached the other side. At least that's what we hoped.


	5. Black Roses

We only had what we needed, bottled water, our IDs, aspirin, a few dollars, and a change of clothes. I had a phone but with power few and far between it was useless most of the time. Mom had her bible, it was worn with age. She said it was her mother's and wouldn't go anywhere without it. It was like the small golden cross around her neck which was her grandmother's. Sadly I never met either Omega but I heard they were kind, strong Omegas in their own rights. She felt that they were, while gone always they were watching over her.

I wore my favorite brown jacket; it was a bomber's jacket I found in a thrift shop in town a few years before. At the time it was a little big for me but that didn't matter or that it smelled like old leather and slightly like the Alpha that owned it before me. It was warm with fur trim and the scent always gave me a sense of security. Like I could do anything with it on so while around us the people looted and fled we felt somewhat protected.

We were careful though and kept to the shadows. Stupidest thing we could have done was be out in the open. Two Omegas alone, well we would have been asking for trouble. Sure at one point we had police but than with each battle and attack what was once the norm faded away into lawlessness. But while I was an Omega I didn't look exactly like one. I was taller than most male omegas I knew and along with the jacket I wore I gave off the mixed scent of a beta so I could protect her if anyone would have approached us but still.

She was all I had left after all and while I was afraid of losing her I was happy that she needed me. After about two weeks of walking we were low on supplies and she was tired so we decided to stop for the night and since we didn't have anything we could trade with for a night in an inn we chose the woods instead. "Alfred?" She asked me after we found a quiet spot in a little grove about two miles from a small town. Or at least what was left of it, sure there was a few lights on but mostly the world around us was dark.

"Hmm?" I answered as she smiled up at me from her bed she made for herself under a large ash tree.

"Do you mind gathering a little wood please?" I knew she was exhausted and with a slight night chill in the air I understood why she wanted me to get it.

I smiled at her before kissing the top of her head, "Sure Mom you hang tight and I'll grab a lot of wood." Something deep down inside of me told me not to leave her alone but as I still grabbed my flashlight and ventured into the woods around us. While I wanted to stay close to our little camp the sticks and logs were damp from a late afternoon shower. I remembered the town and followed the glow of a single small light down to the main street; I thought that since I could see a thin gray smoke as I got close that they had to have dry wood somewhere. Sure it was probably a stupid idea but I what else could I have done? So I turned off my flashlight and slowly entered the town.

The town had a few houses and as I walked down a deserted street a dog barked from a house a few yards away. I ducked as the back door opened and a large Alpha walked out, yelled at the dog in a rough drunken stammer before he returned inside. I was thankful he didn't see me as I made a beeline across the street to another house that thankfully didn't have a dog. I hopped the fence and scanned the yard for anything I could use. If this had happened before the war honestly I would have been chuckling to myself as I hummed a spy song or acted like I was a ninja looking for my victim while my brother and friends waited across the street waiting for the homeowner to catch us. It would have just been a game to play in the middle of a summer night.

Funny how that all changed so quickly but I couldn't think of the past at the time. Lucky for me I spotted a small pile of wood under a tarp in the far corner of the yard. My heart raced as I took an armful before making a dash for the tree line again.

While I hoped I won't be longer than a few minutes I could tell by the moon high above me that it took nearly an hour. I turned the flashlight back on as I struggled to find my bearings in the dark, "Mom?" I whispered out hearing nothing but crickets answer me. Something felt wrong, it was a deep instant feeling that I can't explain even now but I knew something was wrong. "Mom?" I called out again slightly louder and more frantic than before. "Mom?"

The wood was forgotten as I raced up the hill towards where I hoped the grove was. I didn't care how much noise I was making as long as she was alright. She's just sleeping I thought to myself, she can't hear me was another one as I spotted the ash tree right ahead of me a few yards away so I sprinted towards it. "Mom!?" I called out to her still not getting an answer from the dark mass I could see below the ash tree.

Suddenly the smell hit me and it's a smell I'll never forget, it's something I dream about even today…it was a smell of blood, lust and death. It was something I never wanted to smell again but I still had to get to her, make sure she was okay and that it was all a fucked up dream. That she'd scold me for forgetting the wood back down the hill and yelling at the top of my lungs.

As I turned to face where my mother was supposed to be my eyes couldn't fathom what was in front of me.


	6. Cypress

I couldn't hear anything but this loud primitive scream, it was the loudest thing I ever heard and it managed to grow louder as I went from there staring at my mother's bloody lifeless body to kneeling in the cold earth as I held her head in my arms. It was pure sorrow and pain like a wounded animal ringing in my ears and it wasn't for a long time after did I realize it was coming from me. And even then I couldn't stop myself from screaming as I held her tightly to my chest. I didn't care if the bastard Alphas that killed her came back for me in fact I wanted them too.

I wanted them to come back so I could kill them for what they took from me, from her. They took her life in the worst way possible and where was I? Why didn't I hear her scream out for me? Did she? Did she know that if she cried out either I won't hear her or worse that I would and come running only to be defiled like she was? Raped and left to die in my own pool of blood right next to her or could I have defended her like the hero I felt I was and save her from this fate. It's still something I think about it and it haunts me.

My screams turned to sobs as I cried into her soft brown hair now a cascade falling past her shoulders before mixing with the blood around us. It was so much blood, how could it all have been hers? Was there nothing left? The Alpha or Alphas that did it didn't return and as the sun finally rose the next morning I finally had to face the fact…my mother, the Omega that gave birth to me, protected me and loved me was gone. I kissed her forehead one last time knowing what I had to do.

We were nothing, just two Alpha-less Omegas in a land that all but had gone to hell. No one cared what happened to us but I cared what happened to her. Gingerly I picked her up in my arms and carried her towards a small laurel tree that we had past coming up to this grove and laid her gently under it as I started to dig. I'd be damned if I left her out in that grove to…rot or let the wild animals find so I dug all morning with nothing more than my bare hands. I had to take off my jacket and laid it over her as I continued well into the afternoon. I was tired but I didn't care until I made it to a point where I knew she'd be safe. By then I was caked in dirt, blood and sweat as I stepped out of the grave and carefully wiped off my hands. Slowly I removed the cross from around her neck and attached the around my own then I put her in my jacket and put her bible in her hands.

The tears fell again as I kissed her cheek, "Mom…I'm sorry but this way…" The lump in my throat grew bigger as I tried to force it down, "You'll have a little piece of me with you. So when you look down I…" I couldn't finish. No words would come out as I held her for the last time thinking of all the times over the years that she had held me and sang to me. It was a sweet melody that I knew well and as I placed her down into her grave I swear I could hear it.

"Hush my sweet child, my darling boy. I'll always be with you until I'm no more. The angels smile down at you and on me. And until we're united again you will see. That I love you as you love me.

Hush my son, I love you and there's nothing that I won't do. I will protect you until my life is through. For you are my world, you see for I love you and you love me."

The tears weld up in my eyes as I placed a small wild flower on her grave. For the first time in my life I felt completely alone in this world. She was gone, for no reason but to satisfy a monster's lust and I hated him for it. I hated every fucking Alpha it this world. They made the wars, they caused the fighting, they took away everyone that was ever precious to me and for what? What was the point in all of this? "They won't take me…." I muttered softly as I turned to walk away. To where I wasn't sure anymore, all I knew was I wanted to leave…I held tight to the cross around my neck never once daring to look back fearing that she'd be there with that sweet smile on her face and an iris in her hair ready to tell me, "Mon Ange I love you." It was an all-consuming fear and so I did something I normally never did…I started to run. I grabbed my bag before running past the blood soaked ash tree, sprinting for my life as if her ghost was at my heels. I ran until my lungs threatened to burst and my legs wanted to give out but I continued never once looking back in fear of what I might see.

Strange looking back at it that it almost felt like it wasn't me running. It wasn't something I would do, I mean sure I was an Omega but I would have stayed and fought whatever demon was after me. But then I don't think I was in my right mind, not since I left her the night before was I really thinking clearly.

My legs finally gave out as I stumbled out of the woods and right into a mud soaked field. I coughed as my lungs tried to catch up as I balled a handful of mud and grass in my hands while I trembled. And again I found myself screaming, but I don't know if I was screaming the whole time or just started as I stared down at the earth below me. This time I let it all out before feeling that someone was watching me. Slowly I looked up to see the shocked faces of five Alphas but one caught my gaze. He was a slightly older Alpha man with piercing red eyes that stared back at me in a mix of shock and disbelief. We stared at each other for what seemed like hours before the world around me suddenly went dark.


	7. Anthuriums

I awoke in a cold sweat staring up at a sea of stars above me. They were somehow a comfort to me, because I felt it was nothing more than a dream. But then I turned to the small fire and the Alphas sitting around it and my heart sank deep in my chest. For a second I thought I could both lie back down and pretend to sleep or simply make a break for it but the moment his eyes locked with mine I knew it would be useless.

"You're awake." He said simply with a soft smile as the others turned to stare at me. "My name's Gilbert." He then pointed to the others. "This bastard here is Abel." He said with a laugh as a tall blue eyed man laughed along before turning to the man on his left. He was taller than this Gilbert with blonde hair and sharp blue eyes that stared coldly at me. "This is my little brother Ludwig." He said wrapping his arm around his brother's neck. "The other two well is Kiku but he doesn't talk much and the last dude is Antonio but mostly we call him Tony." The other two nodded.

The one named Tony smiled at me trying to put me at some ease, "And what's your name?"

"Alfred." I said never taking my eyes off the five Alphas. I didn't know what they did to me while I was out cold or if it was one of them that caused me to pass out so I had to be ready for anything.

What I wasn't ready for was Gilbert's question, "Why where you running?"

"What?"

"You looked like a ghost was after you or something."

It honestly sent a chill down my spine as I sat up remembering my mother's lullaby in my head, "I was running from...someone." It wasn't a complete lie after all and for the most part that seemed to have been enough for them.

Ludwig nodded as he looked past me at the woods that I had emerged from, "Well whoever they were are gone now."

I didn't believe that, I couldn't. You can't run from a ghost and when I looked back towards the looming forest I felt her watching. "You can stay with us." One of them said as I turned back around.

"No, sorry but that's a little odd don't yah think?" I answered with a smile, "I mean a beta hanging around with a bunch of Alphas I mean thanks but I got this." I shrugged slightly hoping I stilled smelled enough like my jacket to fool them.

I could tell Abel wanted to say something but Gilbert cleared his throat, "Fair enough but it's not smart for anyone to be walking around in the middle of the night. So hey at least for the night why don't you stay here?" Somehow I felt I didn't have much of a choice in the decision so I nodded.

I was thinking fast and had to play it cool, "Yeah I get it man. It makes sense so thanks for not taking all my shit and leaving me in the mud." I grinned at them like I would do to my brother and it seemed to work as most turned back around to the fire.

"So you want to join us around the fire?"

"Nah I should try and sleep." I said knowing by how my legs were throbbing that I'd be sore in the morning and the last thing I wanted to do is use them again. So I laid back down pretending to sleep but I kept an eye on the men around the fire. Slowly one by one they moved away from the fire and drifted off to sleep. All but one that is, the one named Kiku sat calmly by the fire clearly looking out for anyone who might be out in the dark.

I don't know when but I drifted off to sleep, dreaming of my mother's garden again. I swore I could smell the roses bursting with life and there in the middle of the daisies, tulips and marigolds was my mother. "Alfred." She said with a soft smile, "They're good Alphas."

"Because they think I'm a Beta." I answered sitting with her as a bee buzzed past. "Once they know I'm an Omega they'll-"

"They already know." She interrupted with a small sigh, "You can't fool them mon Ange."

I looked down at my hands, "Mom…I can't."

"Don't hate them Alfred."

"Why not? They're the reason you're gone." It was strange, I knew she was gone but here I was arguing with her and when she reached out and took my hand I swear I could feel her warm touch. "I hate them."

She sighed softly at me, "Hate is a strong word for men you don't know."

"Well, what if they're the bastard that-"

"They aren't Alfred. Now stay with them." She said sternly as a butterfly landed on her shoulder. "Remember Alfred…I want you to be happy." Her smile was sweet and angelic as she slowly disappeared, "Love them and they will love you."

It might have been a dream but it was her, and as I opened my eyes I felt her kiss my cheek. Instantly I regretted it as every muscle in my body ached. It wasn't like my body wasn't use to the activity but it had been too much. I winced as I slowly rose from my spot in the grass to see the Alphas once again sitting by the fire, this time though with bowls of oatmeal in their hands.

"Morning." Gilbert said with a smile as Anthony offered me a bowl, "You look like shit."

Ludwig tried to smack him in the back of the head but the white haired man moved at the last moment, "What he meant to say was, you still look sick."

"No I get it." I forced a chuckle, "I probably do look like shit." I joined them at the fire but sat farther away from them just in case. "But thanks for breakfast." After all those days with little food it was a blessing and soon it was gone. It wasn't until I lifted my head up did I see once again they were all staring at me, "What? Did I get some on me?"

"Haven't eaten much?"

"Well not really…" I said wiping my mouth with my sleeve only then remembering that I was still covered in dried blood and mud. "I'm going to the border and only took what I could carry."

Abel nodded as he took my bowl, "Makes sense and hell we're all going that way."

"Oh? Why's that?"

This time Ludwig answered, "We're soldiers that had enough."

Soldiers? My mind was racing a mile a minute when he uttered that, "Have you seen my brother?"

"What's your brother's name?"

"His name is Matthew Williams, he's my twin brother so he has blonde hair, blue eyes and he's slightly taller than I am. He's really quite and please, tell me you've seen him." I didn't realize how desperate I sounded but then I really didn't care.

They all shook their heads after a moment. I knew it was a long shot but damn it if I wasn't going to try. But this was something odd than. That would mean they're all deserters and if that's so than why would they be out here in the open? It was almost if Kiku could read my thoughts because he turned to me, "The war...is a lost cause."

"Please it wasn't a fucking war. It was a bunch of assholes waving their dicks around then when someone blinked it went all to hell."

"What?" I understood but it was a strange way of putting it.

"The bastard says shit like that so don't pay attention." Gil said with a chuckle as Abel shook his head, "Well it's true."

"But why am I a bastard?"

"You fucked my Omega sister right?"

"Yeah?"

"Then you're a bastard."

"Wait, then why isn't Ludwig calling me that too?"

Ludwig just sighed, "Because when you don't expect it I'm going to kill you."

"Then why would you tell me now?"

"So you can expect it."

"That's fucked up."

Anthony shook his head as he turned back to me, "So anyway we're just a handful of hundreds that's given up the fight. But we know that we could find a new life across the border so since we're going the same way would you want to come too?"

I had a feeling it was coming but I didn't know what to say. I wanted to tell them no with every being of my body but something was holding me back. Maybe it was what my mother had told me in the dream or a fear of being alone again but either way I nodded.

"Good so do you want a change of clothes?"

"Um…yeah that would be awesome dude." I stood up but quickly sat back down as my body screamed at me. "I'm just gonna sit here."

"No problem." Gilbert said as he handed me a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt, "And you can keep them since yours are…"

"Fucked up, yeah I know." I smiled as I quickly changed amazed by how much was coating my clothes, "Damn." I said as I threw them to the side never wanting to see them again. "Um so when are we going?"

"Tomorrow since you clearly can't go anywhere."

"Oh than just leave me and I'll catch up." I didn't know why I didn't think of that in the first place. But Gilbert just shook his head, "It's okay."

"If you were a beta than sure but then that's not entirely true is it?" I stared at him knowing I didn't have to say a word. "Okay then it's settled." He said as he picked up my old clothes and tossed them into the fire. "We leave tomorrow morning."


	8. Snapdragons

I watched them as they talked, laughed and ate together. It gnawed at me to watch as they joked around while I sat there in pain and anger. I wouldn't let it show so I plastered a smile on my face until I was finally able to stand as the sun started to sink below the horizon. "You okay Alfred?" Abel asked as I walked towards a small stream a few yards away.

"Yeah I just have to take a piss." I answered as I walked past the stream and towards a small group of saplings. Really I just wanted to be alone and hoped they wouldn't follow. As I reached them I leaned against the oldest one and stared up at the stars starting to appear above. I've always wondered what it would be like to travel among them and leave this world behind so among the stars I let myself be drawn in as if I was floating among them. "Damn…"

"They're beautiful aren't they?"

I looked back to see Kiku looking up as well, "Yeah they are only thing left that really is." After a moment of looking up I decided to clear the air.

"You all know I'm an Omega?"

"Yes, we knew the moment you fainted." He said plainly.

"I passed out…." I corrected.

Kiku nodded slowly apparently not wanting to argue, "Alright then, but why were you covered in blood?"

Shrugging I answered him. "I was attacked in the woods and it was my attacker's blood."

"Hmm."

"What?" I knew he didn't believe me. I wasn't use to lying and even though I tried they could see past my stories.

"Why are you lying?" He asked as he looked at me with confusion, "unless you were attacked by an Omega." He must have seen the look on my face because he quickly stopped. "I'm sorry if you don't want me to know than you don't have to tell me."

"Yeah thanks." I answered thinking I'd never tell anyone especially them what happened in the woods. "So what now?"

"They were telling you the truth. We're going to the northern border and you're more than welcome to join us." I believed him so again I nodded.

"But…"

"We won't do anything Alfred, you have my word."

"Okay." I answered as I followed him back to the fire and sit among them. Honestly I didn't trust any of them but slowly as a few days past I started to. It was hard at first but slowly I opened up slightly to them.

Each one was a bit strange but that's why I think we got along so well and while I didn't want to I knew the only way I might survive this was to…mate with one of them. But I wasn't going to tell them what I was thinking and really I could hear my mother screaming at me to not just pick one with my head but actually love one. To trust one completely and while I trusted them it wasn't like I was traveling with Betas or other Omegas. They were still Alphas after all…

"Something on your mind?" Gilbert asked me one day as we walked alone a deserted road as the wind brushed dirt and sand past our feet.

"Not much…but I guess I should tell you something." I looked over at him as I tried my best not to blush with embarrassment, "I um…my heat is going to start in a few days..." It was the first time I really talked about it with another Alpha besides my brother and by the ways his eyes widen it was the last thing he expected me to say.

"Oh is that so?" He said stammering slightly and I knew I caught him off guard. "Well then we'll stop and find you a safe place to have it then." He said after a moment with a warm smile.

I shook my head, "You don't have to Gil it'll just slow you guys down."

He wrapped his arm around my shoulders like he'd do with Ludwig. "We're not in that big of a hurry. It's not like this place is being dragged to hell or anything." I could tell he was trying to be funny but this was one thing I was afraid of since the beginning. What if they couldn't handle my pheromones and attacked me in the middle of my heat? Would I have enjoyed it? It actually got me thinking more, I mean I would be out of my mind in a way so would I scream out in fear or welcome it? It was a twisted thought that would not go away as we found a spot to make camp for my week.

It was near a small shed and it was clear why we had stopped. So I quickly went to work making the place as comfortable as I could with what I had. "You need anything else?" Tony asked once I was nearly finished.

"No I don't think so but I wish it had a lock…"

He nodded, "True but you should be fine. We'll be here if someone tries to get you." And with that he closed the door.

Alone in my shed I shuddered, "Yeah…that's what I'm afraid of."


	9. Daffodils

Heat is a strange thing. It makes your whole body quiver and twitch until every muscle in your body aches and screams out for relief. But relief doesn't come until you find yourself so exhausted that sleep forces itself on you. You know what will relieve your pain so you scream out names until your voice is hoarse from moaning. As a virgin you don't know how they will relieve the quivering and heat radiating from your body but its instants driving you. Instants twist your mind until the only thing you can think of is mating. You want an Alpha on top of you, mating with you and making a litter. Than you find your mind drifting to that thought of litters, what would they look like? How many would you have and would they be Alphas, Betas or Omegas?

When I was alone in my shed it's all I thought about, every fiber of my being was crying out for the pain to stop, for the heat that was consuming me to go away. It was my own personal hell and the only thing I could do between the screaming was to think and I thought of everything. It always helped me since I first started my heats a few years before. I never when through it alone though, my mother would hold my hand or just sit by my bed as I thrashed around and in return when she would go through hers I would sit by her bedside.

Her and my own thoughts would get me though the hardest parts but during this heat it was driving me insane. I was one Omega in full heat with five Alphas right outside my door or where they? I looked towards the one fogged up window but couldn't see anything but the blue sky above. The next thought scared me more, what if they left? What if they left me in this fucking shed to scream and cry out and they were just laughing at me for being a stupid Omega. "Bastards!" I screamed out as I kicked at the door not once wondering why it wouldn't give. "Fucking Alpha shit!" I screamed louder, "All of you! You're nothing but cowards!"

I thrashed around before finally as the sun sank low and my shed grew dark once again did I drift off to sleep. The next morning was my final day of heat and I could feel my hunger returning to me so I sat up and leaned against one of the walls. I was still feeling my muscles twitch and I was sweating bullets but it was slowly lessening. Strange how a year or so ago we probably would have ordered a pizza and once I could stomach food I would woof down the whole thing in a matter of moments than ask for seconds.

My stomach growled loudly as the night came and for the first time I could hear what sounded like talking not far away. Slowly I stood and wiped the wet glass seeing a small fire in the dark and instantly I found myself smiling. "So are we still bastards?" I heard a voice ask from right outside my door.

"I…no." I answered sitting back down, "Sorry?"

He chuckled and the moment he did I knew who it was, "It's okay I mean I know Abel is one but me? Nah I'm too awesome to be one. So are you hungry?"

"Starving but I'm not exactly done with my heat yet."

I could tell he was thinking because it took him a moment to answer, "Well what about breakfast? It's only a few hours away."

"I'll be ready to come out by then…" I looked towards the door, "How long have you been out there?"

"Not long a few minutes or so. Why do you want me to leave?" Something about the way he said it told me he wasn't going to even if I asked. He'd just probably stop talking or at least try to. So I told him no. "So can I ask you a question?"

"Well I guess…"

"Whose blood was that and what were you running from?"

I brought my knees up to my chest as I sigh now feeling cold, "Gilbert…could you ask me any other question than that?"

"You don't want to tell me?"

"Not really."

"Don't you trust me?"

I shook my head even though I knew he couldn't see it, "It's not about trust…it hurts and…" I wiped my eyes as I felt the tears threatening to fall, "It was my Mom…it…"

"We can change the subject." He said quietly although I could tell he wanted to know more but he wouldn't push it. "Why are you going to the border?"

Quickly I wiped my eyes again, "Um…I have an uncle that I'm supposed to go live with."

"Alpha?"

"Yeah, on my Dad's side…Gil?"

"Yeah?"

I inhaled slowly as I wrapped a torn blanket around myself now noticing I was practically naked, "Um when I'm ready to talk about it…"

"Yeah I'll listen. I just know this isn't the best way of doing it…whenever you want to talk I'll be here." Somehow I could just tell he was smiling. "But for now why don't you try and get some sleep?"

"Sure…" I said as I laid back down and curled up on my bed then shivering slightly from the night chill, "Good night."

"Good night Alfred."

When I awoke the next morning I quickly got dressed and tried the door. It was odd but it wouldn't budge for a moment so I pushed harder only to see Gilbert stumble away from it, "Oh sorry." I said as I reached out my hand for him to take. "I didn't know you were behind the door."

He took my hand and stood up, "It's fine. I mean I never told you that's where I was sitting so." He shrugged, "Anyway are you still starving?"

"Um yeah." I blushed slightly as I noticed Anthony was making breakfast, "Thanks."

It wasn't until later when I was alone with Anthony as I helped him clean up that I learned why the door won't budge that night I kicked it. Since my week first began Gilbert had sat against the door glaring forward with his hand holding tight to his pistol. He didn't say one word until he was sure I was nearly finished so not to scare me. "He's a loud asshole but he has his moments." Anthony said as he finished cleaning the bowls we had used. "I think he would have shot anyone that even tried to open that door."

"What if he tried to open it?" I asked handing him a bowl.

Anthony motioned over to Ludwig, "My guess he told his brother to shoot him if he tried but I don't know for sure. You could ask him yourself."

"I just might." I said as I walked towards the albino man unsure what I'd really say but I knew what my mother would have said. So I took a deep breath and let my heart do the talking.


	10. Delphiniums

It was slow going towards the border. Things were either destroyed or road blocked so we had to go around or else deal with angry territorial Alphas. "You guys can cross if you leave us the pretty Omega." One cooed as he stared right at me as he licked his lips.

I glared back as Ludwig cleared his throat, "We'll go around."

"It'll take you a few extra days." He said with a laugh as he looked at me with lust, "He's just an Omega and we'll treat him fairly."

At that moment Abel wrapped his arm around my shoulders and walked me away, "No I don't think so." He said shouting back at them, "We'll keep our friend here, why don't you fuck yourselves if you want a good time?" We had to run at that point since they really didn't appreciate anything the Danish man had to say. "Bastards." He panted once we lost them, "Next time we stay and fight."

"There were twenty of them." Kiku noted as he looked around with his hand still holding tightly to a very old katana he wore on his belt. He once told me it was his great grandfather's and was all he had left of his large family. I once asked him about it but he won't say much nor about his family.

Abel on the other would talk non-stop about everything and anything. He was loud and brash but his heart was in the right place. "Oh we could have handled fifty of them." He said with a wide grin, "Nothing we haven't done before."

"And if they had friends?"

"We would have kicked their asses too."

At this Anthony shook his head. "You are going to say something your ass can't cash one of these days, my friend." I learned his name was really Antonio and there was a time when he had a mate and two children. But that changed the day our country was attacked, maybe that's why he would sit next to me and hum little Spanish songs. He told me once that I reminded him so much of his oldest son. "And then what are you going to do then?"

"Kick ass like I've always done."

At that point Gil chuckled, "So while we would be busy kicking ass one would have taken Alfred and dragged him away."

"I could have handled myself. I'm not some weak little Omega." I think it shocked a few of them as they all turned to me and stared. "Hell, I could get to the fucking border without you if I wanted to!" I was angry and glared mostly at Gilbert. I had told him a little of what had happened so while I knew why he said it deep down it hurt me so much. With that I turned on my heels and started off towards where I hoped was the border.

"Alfred, where are you going?"

I didn't answer as I continued to walk. It wasn't long before I felt a hand grab around my wrist. I spun around on my heels and stared right into crimson eyes, "Let go of my hand."

He looked deep into my eyes as if he was staring into my soul, "I didn't say it to offend you. It was just to prove a point."

"Yeah sure but I'm not helpless." I hissed as I tried to stay angry at him only to find none. "I won't let myself be raped by a bastard Alpha that thinks he could fuck with me."

He nodded knowing there was much more to the story, "I know. You're not exactly the smallest Omega and in a fight I'd be happy to have you by my side." It made me blush instantly as I looked away and I could tell it was coming from his heart. "I lost my Mama too; she was a beautiful omega with a wild imagination and spunk that you won't believe. I loved her, hell we all did."

I watched him as he spoke and I wasn't sure where it was going, "What happened to her?"

Gilbert looked me in the eye as if he was telling me the time of day and said, "My father killed her because he said she had cheated on him. He claimed she attacked him first but I know exactly why she was killed."

A shiver ran down my spine as I stared at him, "Why?"

"Because she had been raped earlier that year and he couldn't let it go. It ate at him but not because he couldn't do anything about it but because he thought she was responsible for it. He said she won't have been if she wasn't asking for it. He never once saw what she was going through, never asked if she was okay or that she still loved him. Then one night he dragged her out by her hair and shot her in the street. He left her to die and no one did a damn thing about it."

I just stood there as what he said settled in my mind, "Why are you telling me this?"

"Because when you fell out of those woods I knew that look because that was the same look I had that day. I'm telling you because mostly this is between you, me and these trees here." I understood his reasons loud and clear. I don't know how but he sensed I wanted to talk if his story was true I have no idea but I doubted that he would lie to me about anything like that.

So I told him my story or at least what I wanted to tell him and he listened and nodded his head every so often until I finished. "So now what?" I asked once I was done, "Tell the others? Call me a bastard for just burying her there?"

He shook his head, "Like I said this was between you, me and the trees. I would have probably done most of the same things honestly. As for what now that's up to you. I won't force you to stay if you don't want to." It again felt sweet and kind to me and while I didn't want to admit it I was falling for the white haired man. Perhaps simply because he had opened up so much to me and in return I felt safe with him, felt love but I wasn't going to be easy.

"Are you like this with any Omega you know?"

"Only the ones I like." He said with a smirk that once again turned my face a bright red. I don't know why but I hit him hard on the shoulder as I walked back towards our group.

"Shut up Gilbert." I said with a sway of my hips just to see if I could cause the same blush on his face. I looked back just to see him wrap his arms around my shoulder and whispered something into my ear.

"Make me Sparrow because the awesome me would like to see you try."


	11. Field Anemones

"Are you really going to let him eat off your plate like that?" Gilbert said with a sigh as he watched Ludwig and his new friend. "It's not awesome little brother."

The taller man looked up before handing the two year old German Shepard beside him another small clump of rice. "She's eating mine not yours so for the last time shut up." As he said it he tossed the dog that he had named Gabi another scrap. We had found the young dog a day or two before and instantly the blonde man's heart melted for the brown dog.

Gilbert sighed as he turned back to his own meal, "Fine but if Gabi goes for my food-"

"You'll give her some too." Ludwig finished handing the dog what was left on his plate before scratching behind her left ear lovingly.

I stopped listening after that as I let my mind wander. We'd arrive at the border the next day and I couldn't help but be both excited and sad. "What's on your mind my friend?" Antonio asked me as he finished his own dinner. "Scared?"

"Not really Dude." I answered as I picked at my meal. I hadn't been hungry for the past few days and at the time I thought it was just my nerves getting the best of me. "More nervous than anything." I said as I finally gave up on eating and laid my meal down for Gabi to eat.

Abel picked it up before the dog could reach it, "Nope you eat." He said as he handed me back the meal. I looked down at the simple meal of rice and beans as he continued. "Just eat the rice than or beans but eat something."

"I'm not hungry." I said as I played with my fork. It was strange since normally I would have eaten my meal before trying to steal Gilbert's. I was always joking when I did it and handed back whatever I stole…with only one or two bites taken out of it. But now I just wanted it out of my hands. "Kiku you still hungry?" I asked as I turned to the smaller man with hopes that he'd take it from me.

He shook his head, "No I'm not." He said simply, "Are you perhaps sick?"

At that point Gilbert was watching me. I hadn't agreed to be his mate but since our talk in the woods he treated me like I was his Omega. So it didn't surprise me when he reached over and felt my head. It was cold to the touch and it wasn't long before he let out a sigh, "You are warm."

"No you're just cold." I remarked as I took a bite and forced it down. As it hit the bottom of my stomach I could feel it wanting to return back up. I cupped my hand over my mouth as I quickly stood the food in my lap forgotten and thrown to the side as I rushed towards a couple of bushes. I heaved and gagged before feeling a soft hand on my back.

He patted my back softly, "It's okay Sparrow…" Gilbert cooed softly as he helped me back to my spot and sat me down slowly. "Just sit tight." I could hear the concern in his voice as Gabi walked up and licked my face. She must have been thanking me for letting her have my dinner since right after she went to work eating what was left.

Abel kneeled down and took my chin and stared at my eyes before gingerly feeling my forehead as Gil had just done. "Al, you are really warm. Does your stomach feel like its on fire?"

I didn't like how he said it and something about it made me wonder what they thought I might have. "No…why?" I managed wishing that they'd just drop it and move on but I knew it wasn't going to happen. "Look I'm fine." I managed a smile as I tried to stand up only to be sat down again. I could tell they cared but sometimes I felt like a child around them. "Damn it I'm not ten let me stand up."

Ludwig offered his hand and I let him pull me up, "Better?"

"Yeah actually it is." I answered back looking them over, "And I want to make it to the border tomorrow."

They all turned to Gilbert who thought it over and nodded, "Okay we make it over the border than you-"

"Then I'm finding my uncle." I finished as I stood tall. Sure they were Alphas but I didn't feel like they would attack me for standing my ground. It was really the only thing on my mind and nothing was going to stop me and as long as I didn't blink first I was sure they'd agree. I didn't sense it but I really should have, there was a sudden change as all but Gilbert turned and walked away.

He slowly walked up to me never once taking his eyes off of mine as he spoke just inches from my face, "You know there's a difference between standing your ground when a few Alphas are being dicks and being a complete asshole to a group of guys who actually care about you. Guess which one you're being right now."

I stared back at him for a moment and while a part of me wanted to be defiant and tell him that I never asked them too…I blinked, "Why?" I asked instead.

Gil sighed as he patted my head, "Because we do, we all lost things Alfred but that doesn't mean we have to be complete asses about it. We care…I care about you, Sparrow." Again he touched my cheek with the palm of his hand and slowly I reached up and laid mine over his.

"I know…" I said softly. I knew what I was supposed to do but I was nervous. It was then that he placed his lips on mine and squeezed my hand. When I didn't back away it was all the answer he needed. So after what felt like an hour passed he broke our kiss and I cleared my throat, "I still want to make it over the border."

"We will."

"Tomorrow?"

"Al, we're doing this legally and they won't let you across if you're sick."

"Then we can sneak across." I answered knowing that they might have had a point. If we snuck across what was to stop them from sending us back? Our nation was in turmoil and lawless but it didn't mean anything to the border patrol if they caught us. "Fine but I'm not sick."

He chuckled as he shook his head, "Stubborn aren't you Sparrow."

I shrugged slightly, "Well I could say the same about you really." It wasn't long after did I have to admit I was getting sick, since about midnight I staggered into the bushes again and didn't leave until the first light of morning.

"Anything left?" Abel asked as he unzipped his jeans and peed on a nearby tree.

"There was nothing there to begin with." I said as I sat back feeling exhausted as the sweat dripped down my face. I wiped it with the bottom of my shirt as I leaned back into the cool earth as Gabi walked over and licked my face. "No Gabi go away." I cried out as Ludwig whistled for her.

"Leave him along Gabi." He said once the dog was by his side again. "Gil I think we should make camp for a few days instead."

Gilbert nodded as he looked around in deep thought. "I was thinking the same thing and honestly we should start thinking about if they don't let us across at all." It was whispered but I still heard every word. "For all we know they closed the border. It's not awesome but honestly it's what I would do."

"Something permanent than?" Kiku asked as he looked towards an old farmhouse twenty or so miles from where we were. "I think we should find a building and make camp."

"Think it's deserted?"

Kiku nodded never taking his eyes off the small group of buildings, "But we should check just to make sure."

"Yeah." Ludwig picked up his bag, "We'll be back." With a short whistle to Gabi the three were off.

I sighed, it wasn't fair. We were so close it ate at my heart that we just stopped short. I wouldn't stand for it but as I tried to stand I felt as if my head was going to burst so for the moment I was stuck. And while today I feel guilty about it, my only satisfaction was that Gilbert might also get sick from sharing our first kiss. It was spiteful and childish but as I closed my eyes it was the only thing still keeping me going.


	12. Alstroemeria

When I awoke I was in a small room filled with dust and the midday sun. It was clear at least from my view on the old wooden four post bed that I was in either the master bedroom or their Alpha child's room. To my left was a stone chimney and to my right was large bay windows letting me have a view of the forest and over grown cornfield beyond. I stared out of them before hearing the door open just behind my head and a cold cloth placed on my head, "So feel like eating?" Antonio asked with a warm smile, "Or at least water?"

"Water please." I said as I slowly sat up, "How long have I been out?"

He handed me the glass before sitting at the edge of the bed, "Only a day or so but at least it wasn't anything to serious…"

Slowly I took a sip thankful that it stayed down, "What do you mean?"

"It's not important so just rest." He said as he started to stand.

I grabbed his wrist, "Wait, please." He looked down to my hand as I slowly let go, "Toni, can you please tell me? I'm…I want to understand what's going on and I can tell you're hiding from me."

"Yes we are." He sighed, "When you got sick we thought it might be…" He looked away, "They were experimenting in germ warfare, one of them causes the stomach to practically eat itself."

"W-What?!" Instantly my hands wrapped around my stomach as I stared at him, "What the hell!? Dude why, no how would I have gotten it?"

"You didn't Alfred. If you did you'd be dead right now." He said as he tried his best to calm me down. But I still sat there wide eyed as my mind raced a mile a minute. "As for why…well they had to test it before sending it over."

Again I felt like I was going to be sick but this time it was for different reasons. It didn't make any sense to me. I knew what the government was capable of when they took my brother but I never would have dreamed that they would attack much less kill their own people. Was I really this naïve about the whole situation? I thought as I slowly laid back down and covered my eyes with my arm thinking back to what that large Alpha had once told me, that they could always use Omegas…was that the reason? I was so deep in thought that I didn't hear him enter until he touched my stomach. "Does it hurt?" Gil asked as I moved my arm from my eyes and I noticed that my other hand hadn't moved from its original spot next to his hand.

"Nah its fine, I'm just still not hungry." I watched him for a moment as he sat down next to me, removed the cloth and felt my head. "Your hand is still cold."

"Yeah but at least you're not warm anymore." He removed his hand and replaced it with his lips. Often I wonder if I had told him to stop would our lives had been different, our paths would have changed then and there but something deep in my soul wouldn't let me tell him no. A little voice in my head or possibly my heart yearned for it so when he asked me if he should stop I told him no. But to my surprise he did stop, "Alfred I never asked you and it won't be awesome I took what wasn't mine to take so…" He stopped as he looked into my eyes.

I knew what he wanted me to say, it was so clear he wanted me as his mate I was surprised it took him that long to 'ask'. I thought of everything I could say to him, any angle I could use to get exactly what I want but I couldn't do that to him. I wanted to smirk and say the moment we crossed the border or reached my uncle I would but it just didn't seem right. So after a long pause I chuckled instead, taking his hand, "Yeah Dude." It was funny, I know if my mother had been watching she would have slapped the side of my head for being so informal before giving me a speech about how to treat my mate. So with that speech starting in my head I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed his jaw lightly. "I'll be your mate."

With that he wrapped his arms around my waist and held me close, "Thank you Sparrow." He said quietly before he whispered in my ear, "We'll try for the border but I can't make any promises."

I nodded, "I know." He held me close for the next few hours; he wasn't an Alpha like others I had known. While they would gloat or boast that when they mated they'd take their Omegas instantly Gilbert would only want to hold me. He'd love to cuddle with me and honestly I adored it, while his hands were always ice cold the rest of him was warm and always made me feel safe.

After I was up to it we continued our journey well…nearly all of us. Kiku had a lot of time to think at the farm house and while he enjoyed our company he knew there was nothing for him over the border. "I'm sorry Alfred." He told me as we sat on the porch as the sun sank low on the horizon that day before we were leaving again. "But perhaps it's time I look for my sister…"

"Your sister?" I turned back to him; he rarely spoke of anyone in his family so while at the time I was curious as to why he finally would tell me. Today I know it's because he saw me as a trusted friend. "I didn't know you had a sister."

He nodded slowly, "She's a little younger than me." He won't give me much but I knew it was because he was so private but then at the time I wanted to know more.

"What's her name? And um is she an Alpha or Omega?" I asked hoping to get any answers.

He shook his head as he looked off into the distance, "She's an Omega." He wouldn't give me more than that no matter how much I tried but eventually I gave up and just sat with him as the stars just started to appear. "Alfred?"

"Yeah?"

"If I see your brother," I looked over at him as a lump in my throat grew, "I'll make sure to send him your way."

"I…" I didn't know what to say so I smiled and said the only think I could think of, "Thank you Kiku." He nodded as he gave me a soft smile. "And if I see…"

"Mei."

"If I see Mei I'll send her your way." With that I gave him my only remaining picture of my brother and in return he handed me a small photograph of a young brown haired woman with a kind smile, it was haunting really. Her eyes were so full of life and joy as she held tight to a large pink flower in her hand. "She's cute." I remarked as he nodded.

"She loves flowers especially pink chrysanthemums, they were always her favorite."

"Well…" I said, "Than if I see her I'll give her one and tell her…that her brother misses her."

I still have that photograph, it's aged slightly but it always takes me back to that moment on the porch it was then and there that I realized something important. While I was hurting…I wasn't alone.


	13. Elderberry Blossoms

My heart was racing once the border came into view. While today it's nothing more than a line in the dirt then it was a wall a hundred foot high and it stretched over nearly two hundred miles. Instantly I could feel the cameras staring at us as we joined a long line of others trying to make it to safety. I saw crying Omegas holding their children as their Alphas tried to force their ways across. Blinded and beaten Betas waiting in silence from the sides…old Alphas just staring ahead already having lost everything dear to them only to be turned away and losing all hope and will to live.

Gabi whined as she snuggled next to Ludwig's leg shaking in fear of so many new smells around her. Ludwig simply patted her head, "Easy girl." He whispered as we made our way through the line. It was all that was said from out group. Even Abel was quiet knowing that if the wrong thing was said we'd be told to move along like many others in the line.

Eventually we made our way to the head of the line; there were five tall Alphas and a few Beta men glaring at us as we walked to the gate. "Passports." One Alpha demanded as he started at us. Quickly I handed it to him and as he looked over he began his questions, "I assume you don't have a place to stay?" He said with slight disdain probably hearing it already countless times before us.

"Actually," I started as I took Gilbert's hand, "My Uncle is taking us in."

"Name?"

"Alfred Jones."

"Not you, your Uncle." He shook his head as if what I said was really that stupid.

"Oh right. His name is Scott Kirkland." I answered as he handed me back my passport. I had hoped it was enough to get us across as I just watched him.

He glared at me before his yellow eyes turned to my companions as he returned their passports, "Alright." He said simply motioning for all of us to pass. "Welcome." He said simply and for once I saw something I wasn't prepared to see. He smiled warmly at me as we passed before turning back to the next group in line, "Next!" He hollered as we walked past.

My heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest, it didn't feel real. "We…we made it." I whispered coarsely as a smile widened on my face. Suddenly we were thrown back into a world that we knew. It was a breath of fresh air, it was bittersweet and we still had a way to go but I felt for a moment I was home.

It didn't take long before we found ourselves in a small seaside town just a few miles from the large border wall. While I wasn't expecting a ticker tape parade the glares we received was nerve racking. From each window and door was a set of eyes and as we reached the center of town most could hear the sound of disdain and anger rising from the Alphas and Betas. "This isn't good my friends." Antonio said noticing that we were being followed, "I don't think we should stay here."

"No I don't think you should." A voice called out from a balcony above us, "We don't want your kind here. This isn't a camp so get the fuck out." His long blonde hair was tied back as his jade eyes glared down at us.

"Hey we were just passing through asshole." Abel started as Antonio tried to grab his hand and pull him away from the loud man. "So calm down before I come up there and make you calm down." He growled.

The man above just laughed, "Aww will you now? Why don't you say that to our Mayor?" He said with a wicked smile, "He's right over there and he might have a thing or two to say about shitty Alphas that think they can come up here and boss us around."

"I do actually have a few things ta say." A gruff voice said and while I was ready to make a hasty retreat when I turned I knew we had nothing to fear, well at least from one man in town. "All the lot of yah get back in your houses. They ain't causing yah any trouble." His jade eyes stared up at the Alpha above, "That means you too Emilian."

The group around us stared confused as I stepped forward, "Uncle Scott?"

"Aye Lad." He said quickly as he embraced me, "It's been a long time Alfred." He smiled as he looked me in the eye, "I was expecting just you and your mother, who are these boys and where is your mother?"

I shook my head, "She's gone…"

"And your brother?"

"I don't know…"

He nodded as he turned to the others, "My home is this way." He noticed that many of the Alphas were still standing around so as he held me tightly as he glared at them, "I said that's enough! These Lads are my guests so unless yah want ta spend the night in jail because yah know I'll have the sheriff down here in two seconds!" He boomed as he escorted me towards a large home knowing that where I went the others would follow. I looked back to see a few leave while the one called Emilian continued to stare at us long after the rest had gone. "Lad…my home is your home." He said once the door was closed and locked. "And that goes for the rest of yah." Quickly he produced a cigarette from his pocket and lite it, "So which one of you lot is my Nephew's mate?" He said simply as he looked at the four Alphas with me. "Because I know one of you are."

Gilbert stepped forward, "I am."

"Hmm…" Uncle Scott said as he thought about my mate as he looked him up and down, "You be good ta him you hear?"

"I won't dream of being anything but awesome to him." Gilbert remarked with a light smirk that at the moment I wanted to smack off of him. I feared that Uncle Scott would kick them out that second but to my relief he just chuckled.

"Good to know." He answered as he motioned towards the house, "Like I said my home is your home and you can stay as long as you need."

I couldn't help myself as I reached out and hugged him again, "Thank you Uncle."

"You're welcome Lad." He said as he kissed my temple, "You've probably had a long journey so go rest while." I knew he'd want to know what happened to my mother as softly Gilbert took my hand and led me away with Gabi following at our heels. What I had thought was the end of our journey was really just the beginning.


	14. Mistletoe

Funny how many things we can take for granted especially a hot shower and real meals. Both of which if I had shortly after arriving at my Uncle's home and when I fell asleep I was more than content. I didn't realize until I awoke the next morning that not only was Gilbert asleep beside me but Gabi was also staring at me, "Shoo Gabi." I muttered covering my head with the blanket, "Go bug your master a while."

She whined at me and slowly I rolled out of bed knowing that the poor dog must have had to use the front yard. I opened the front door to see my Uncle already standing out in the early morning sun, "Morning." He said with a smile as he flicked away some ash from his cigarette. "How did yah sleep lad?"

I smiled, "Pretty good um…" I looked towards the village, "Sorry if we caused any trouble."

"They just don't like the fact that they have to be 'involved' is all." He said with a flick of his wrist, "Most of them will get over it." After we watched Gabi do her business he sighed, "I'm sorry Alfred. I really should have came down there myself and brought you two back up here." He leaned up against a post and looked over at the wall, "How did she go?"

At the question I swallowed hard as I looked away, "She…" I stopped and he understood instantly.

"It's okay Lad." He said as he snuffed out his cigarette on the white painted wood. "Now who are these Alphas yah brought with yah?" As he said it he stepped off the porch and I knew he wanted me to follow. "Now the Albino I get."

Gabi trotted along with us as we made our way down to the beach, "Ludwig is his brother and the other two um Abel and Antonio are friends." I said simply as I watched the gulls run ahead of us before Gabi sent them flying. "They're good Alphas and they won't cause that much trouble."

"Oh I saw how much trouble they can cause." He said with a warm chuckle, "Emilian is still pissed off about them but then he's pissed off about most things so it's not much surprise there."

"Yeah but-"

"Lad, if anything happens you'll be the first to know okay?" He said as we started our walk back towards his home. We'd spend many mornings like this just him and I. We'd talk about everything and anything and in time I learned so much about not only my late father but my mother as well. It turned out that she was destined to marry Scott but in the end my father had managed to steal her heart. But while most Alphas would have been vengeful my Uncle accepted it and was actually sad to see them leave. "I came down once before you boys were born," He smiled at me as he smiled warmly, "Your Mother was glowing and that father of yours was so proud to be having twins."

"I'm sure he was." I said as we walked by Antonio one morning as he stared off at the waves crashed on the white beach. "Uncle, can I catch up with you later?" He nodded as he and Gabi returned to the house. I sat beside him, I felt that for a while he had something on his mind but up until then I wasn't sure if I could approach him about it. "Toni?" I asked quietly as I noticed he had doodled in the sand with his finger. It was a small family of four and it wasn't hard to know what it was. "They're in a better place…" I started not knowing what else I was supposed to say.

He sighed as he finally turned to look at me; I saw something in his eyes that made my heart ache. Like the older Alphas we had seen crossing the border his eyes had lost their shine. "I know my friend but…" He stopped as he stared back out at the ocean, "I think it's time I left."

"Toni you don't have to." I looked down at my feet, "Who will keep Abel in line when he starts saying really stupid things?"

At least it made him laugh as he wrapped his arm around my shoulder, "I'm sure you'll be able to do it. He does slightly listen to you."

"That's only because I promised that Ludwig and Gil won't kill him in his sleep." I said with a smile.

"And for that I'm sure he's grateful but…"

"Please don't leave Toni." I had hoped it didn't sound as weak as I thought it felt. "Please…" It choked out as I forced the tears back. I hated it, I knew his mind was made up and nothing I would say would change it. What was worse was I could tell my heat was coming as my emotions bubbled to the surface. There was no stopping them once one tear fell.

He held me close and hummed to me softly, "Shhh Alfred it's okay." He cooed as he wrapped his arms around me, "You're not alone mijo." He kissed the top of my head as he just held me, "It's not forever. We'll see each other again."

"I…I know." It was all I could manage to say as my emotions flooded out. It was times like these that I hated myself for being an Omega. An Alpha would have never broken down like that nor a Beta but there I was sobbing as he sang a Spanish song to me. I don't know what he was saying but it brought me comfort and soon I was able to wipe my eyes. "Promise me you'll keep in touch?"

At that he smiled and the life in his eyes returned. "Yes I promise." He stood up before helping me stand. "You just promise me that you won't cry anymore." His smile was genuine, "Unless they're happy tears."

"I promise." I said as I walked with him up to the house, "Where are you going?"

It was something he really couldn't say not that I could blame him. He left a few days later right before my heat. But I made him a promise and I didn't shed one tear as he walked off towards another town. My only hope was I'd see him again someday.

As he left I could hear the whispers of the town and things on the news while my Uncle tried to hide finally had to tell me. "I was gonna tell yah after but…it didn't seem right." He said as I made my nest, "But I'll tell Gilbert,"

"No I'll tell him after. He's so excited I don't want to worry him." My stomach was already a bundle of nerves and the sudden news just added to my fears but I didn't let it show. "Thank you Uncle…" I said as he left me to finish my nest. "Great…" I muttered once I was alone, "Just fucking awesome."

The week pasted by quickly but it was something I'll never forget. And even a few days after he would do the same things. In the warm sunlight of the morning he would awaken first and kiss me so slowly until my eye lids opened then he would smirk, "Morning." He would purr.

I would chuckle slightly I was his mate for long enough then that I had grown accustom to his little tease. "Morning." I said as I pressed my lips to his. If he was looking for me to blush he was going to be disappointed that time. Well that's what I though anyway.

To my surprise he straddled me with that same damn smirk, "You know," He started as he removed the covers to expose my bare chest. "It won't be long now."

"Until what?" I asked unsure where he was going.

Softly he leaned down and kissed the base of my neck. It sent a welcomed chill down my spine and I couldn't help bet let out a delighted moan. "Gil…" I started but as his lips reached the middle of my chest I knew I wasn't going anywhere. "Damn" I said instead, thinking where ever he was going I'd gladly offer to him.

Finally he came to my belly button and gingerly kissed it, "Here." He said "It won't be long until my Sparrow is carrying my litter." As he kissed it again I felt my heart race and my face redden. He had achieved his task I had just wished he didn't know me enough to do it. While I knew it made him so happy to see me like that it always drove me slightly crazy. "And I'll love them as much as I love you." He said with another added smirk, "Because they'll be half of me and half of you."

I swear I could feel my heart beat out of my chest as he kissed it again letting his lips linger on my cool skin. Than as quickly as he started he sat up and reached for his jeans that he left strewn on the floor beside out bed. Only then did I sit up resting on my elbows and watched him for a moment. "Gil?" I asked quietly as I finally crawled out of bed myself.

"They won't send us back." He said calmly as if he could read my thoughts. "I'm too awesome to be forced back to that fucking hell hole besides." He stopped when I looked away. "Sparrow?"

I let out a sigh as I shook my head, "It's nothing but I've heard a few things…"

"From the other Omegas or from your uncle?"

"From my Uncle."

He stared at me with what I thought was slightly fear in his voice, "What did he say?"

"That's the government wants us out, they don't want refugees here anymore and it's time we left." I could hear my voice crack as I recounted what my uncle had told me. While I knew my Uncle would try all he could there was little we could honestly do…he held me tightly and it was only then I could feel my shoulders start to shake.

"It's okay Sparrow." He whispered quietly in my ear, "I won't let anything happen to you."


	15. Orange Lilies

While tensions were growing high neither Gilbert nor my Uncle would let it show much unless they decided to watch the news. "Bastards." Gilbert growled as he and the other Alphas watched the television screen. "They offer a place to fucking stay they can't just take it back."

Ludwig nodded, "It's foolish at best and at worse…" He sighed as he scratched Gabi's ears, "It will cause riots."

While they all nodded Abel noticed I had been listening in. As we locked eyes he smiled at me as he stood, "Well we're getting ahead of ourselves really." He briskly walked over to me and slung his arm over my shoulders, "Right Al?" When I weakly smiled he laughed, "Riots." He said with a shake of his head as he led me out of the house, "Bullshit really." He muttered now away from the others not so sure.

This wasn't the first time he's escorted me to the town, normally it meant he needed a drink so I figured this time would be the same, "Abel let's not start anything today okay?" I said with a sigh hoping that Emilian wasn't at the bar as well. I knew too well that it would be a recipe for disasters and while normally I would just watch as the two Alphas take drunken swings at each other it wasn't a good idea anymore.

He gave me with a strange look, "But you love it when I kick Emilian's ass…" He was almost pouting at me at that point. "Just one drink."

Again I just sighed as we entered the bar thankful to see only a few Betas drinking wine in a side corner. I sat at our normal seat near the bar as Abel looked over the menu as if he wasn't going to get the same thing he always got. "Hey Charlie can I get a beer?" He grinned as he looked at me.

"I'll have a water please." I said simply.

"Just a water?"

"Fine can I have a lemon in it?" I added as I sat back in my chair.

As Charlie walked away Abel turned to me, "You don't want a beer? Look Alfred all that talk on the news…don't let it get to you."

"I'm not…well." I rested my elbow on the table as I rested my chin on my fist, "Maybe a little but it's not why." I rested my other hand on my stomach absent mindedly by then I had known I was carrying a baby for a few days, "Just not in the mood is all."

His eyes went down to my abdomen as his beer arrived and after he took a sip he spoke up again, "We'll leave after one."

After letting out a small cough I looked away the man before me never left after one beer and it was clear to me he knew, "Is it really that obvious?"

"Not really but all my brothers' mates were the same way." He shrugged as he drank most of his beer, "It's the little things but have you told Gil yet?"

At the thought of telling my mate I wrapped my arms around my stomach, "Not really. I mean what do I say?"

"He'll be happy." He answered but it wasn't what I had asked.

"Oh I know he will be but," I shook my head, "I don't know I wish we could have waited."

To my surprise he chuckled, "To tell you the truth I've heard that a few times too. It's a normal though or…at least in my family it is." He winked as he downed the last of his beer and stood and tipped the bartender a five.

As I stood to leave Emilian stumbled in already drunk off his mind though it wasn't even noon yet, "Oh look it's the bastard." He slurred out glaring at Abel, "Hear the news? Y-Your ass is going back across the border."

While normally Abel would have already hit the guy he simply started to walk past as he made sure I stayed in between him and the drunken man. "Have another drink." Abel remarked just as Emilian took a swing, "Hey!" He growled out as I was pushed outside.

I quickly caught myself only to see a small crowd gathering. I quietly swore as I glanced back at Abel as he threw the drunken man out of the bar and onto the sidewalk. "Look we don't want any trouble." I said in a calm voice, "We were just leaving."

But as I turned I found our way blocked, "Yeah you were." A gruff looking man said as he spit in my direction. "You fucking shit come in here and act like we have ta help you. It's not our fault your government can't do their jobs or more like can't do fucking shit this is our land not yours." He hissed as he glared at me.

While I'm sure Abel wanted to take a swing at him I grabbed his arm and held him back, "We aren't hurting you. We're staying at my Uncles and we have as much rights as you do."

"See that's where you're wrong, you fucking Omega." He took a step forward as the rest either watched or helped Emilian to his feet. "You say that now but I don't trust those Alphas. They'll come in and take our Omegas or Betas." From behind him I could see Gilbert and the others racing to the bar so I had to think fast to avoid a fight.

So I inhaled and gave him a smile I use to use for my brother, "I completely understand Dude I totally do but one Alpha has already left and another is my mate while another is my brother in law."

"There's still this one and what's to stop the others from taking one of ours!?"

"Well for one the other two have no interest in mating; maybe they saw how big of a fucking pain it can be." It was almost as if my mother was in my ear telling me what to say, "As for my mate it's because he's a loyal Alpha and he won't cheat on his mate and the mother of his child." As I said it I laid my hand on my stomach knowing that by then my mate was in ear shot. For the most part the crowd took a small step back none then daring to hit a pregnant Omega. They might have been angry with us but even they still knew it was wrong to take it out on me. "So can we all just go home for now? I mean no one has ta be that asshole today right?" I joked as I was hit from behind by the only asshole in the crowd.

It was a cheap shot and for a moment I saw stars as I fell to the ground being caught by my mate as he snarled at the idiot that did it. "I'll fucking kill you!" He screamed as many other Alphas pulled and pushed Emilian into the bar again. "Bastard, bring him back out here!"

I took his arm and held him close as my vision came back to me, "I'm okay Gil. I'm fine." Truth be told I knew I was going to have a horrible headache but at least he missed anything really important. I kissed his jaw in a weak attempt to calm him down, "The baby's fine."

At that he sighed as the rage left his eyes, "Yeah." He said simply as he held me close resting his large hand on my stomach. As he helped me up and back to the house he never once took his hand off of my belly. I could tell what he was doing, he was protecting out child; guarding it from any other Alpha that would have dared looked my way. I'm not sure if he knew he was doing it or if it was instinct but as I laid my hand on his I knew one thing. It was love driving him and his decisions. While I might not have liked all of what he did his heart was always in the right place. Looking back it's what I loved about him most of all.

**A/N: Hey guys Cat here the thought and idea bunnies have slapped me upside the head with this story and if all goes well I should have this one done in maybe a month. (Hopefully I don't loose internet by then) And for those hoping for smut well...if Alfred's telling his story I doubt he'd go into detail about him and Gil kanoodling. (There's a good reason why he won't I'm sure it'll become very clear by the end XD) Anyway ramble over y'all have a good day or night~**


	16. Purple Carnations

After a few more weeks it became very clear that we couldn't stay. While the town would let me stay I wouldn't without the others. So we packed up what we would need as my Uncle sighed, "Lad I want yah to know you can always come back here." He said with a warm smile, "In fact I suggest having the babe back here."

It was a good idea if I could get back across that is. If I had the baby on this side of the wall they would have that nationality and couldn't be forced out but still that would only help me and possibly Gil but not the others. So I nodded as I finished gathering up my things, "If I can get back I'll try." I hugged him and I could tell he didn't want to let me go. "I'll call you when I can and I love you Uncle."

He smiled at me, he smelled like cigar smoke and good strong whiskey. "I love yah too Lad." I knew he wanted to say more but he held back but he did lean up and kiss my forehead, "Stay safe cause you will always have a home here."

"Thank you and when I find Mattie I'll bring him with me." I doubt he could have smiled any brighter. If he could have given us a car and a safe apartment he would have but all he had was a motorcycle and a spare few hundred dollars. Neither I wanted to take but as we left he crammed two hundred dollars into my hand.

"Stay safe." He said quietly as he folded my hand so I couldn't hand it back, "Gil, yah better keep this boy here safe or I swear ta god I'll find yah and kick your ass." He growled out as all three nodded.

So once again we headed towards the border. Like before we weren't alone as we walked back to the wall. It was a slow go as the throng of people grew and grew. "Alfred, stay close." Gil said as he looked over his head at me.

I nodded as Ludwig whistled to Gabi to stay by his side she in return whined slightly, she was afraid of the tension growing in the air. Abel slung his arm around my shoulder as he watched the crowd, "Gil, we should cross now or wait an hour or so…" He could tell the people around us were getting restless.

"Yeah." Ludwig says guiding Gabi towards the small opening, "I say we leave now."

As I handed over my passport again I found myself in front of the same man from months earlier, "Hello." I said with a soft smile unsure if he'd remember me or not.

He looked up at me and gave me a soft smile, "Hello yourself Alfred." He didn't even look at my passport as he motioned his head towards the other side, "Next!" I along with the others made it across just as shots rang out above a group as screaming echoed out.

It was sheer panic and pandemonium as the screaming continued as people ran unsure who was firing and what they were firing at. It was then I found myself without my mate. "Gilbert!?" I screamed as I searched frantically for him and the others as another shot rang out. "God damn it!"

Suddenly Abel grabbed my hand and pulled me towards him, "It's okay we'll find them." He said without a look of panic. Quickly he pulled me towards the wall with hope that we wouldn't get trampled. While I wanted nothing more than to race out into the crowd and find my mate Abel's grip on my wrist wouldn't wane. "Alfred, calm down." He almost commanded as he scanned the crowd that was now thinning out from maybe a thousand to no more than a couple hundred as people fled for the surrounding areas.

My heart was beating a mile a minute as I yelled out again and again. Finally most of the screaming died down and a few Betas and two children laid dead. While the Betas were clearly shot the two young girls had been trampled in the after mass. While I was prepared to hear crying from their mothers it appears that they were long gone. It made my heart ache knowing that those little blonde girls were left to die alone. Finally Abel let go of my hand and I walked back towards where my mate had been thankful to see Ludwig and Gabi. "Where's Gil?" I asked my voice shaking before I saw the Albino racing towards us. "Oh thank God." I said before wrapping my arms around his neck, "Where the fuck were you?"

"Yeah I'm happy to see you too." He said with a soft chuckle, he was just thankful I wasn't carried off by anyone other than Abel. He kissed my forehead as he moved away from the dead that were being filmed by a news station as a few Alphas slowly picked them up.

It was surreal; there was no real reason to fire out into the crowd, they were restless yes but it wasn't out of control by any means. It was as if only to give the news something else to talk about. It was as if the war that was still supposedly going on didn't exist anymore but by then none of us were sure it really was a war in the first place. There was an attack yes but since then there was nothing but chaos and turmoil. Even know I don't understand at any of it, but than even those causing it probably don't even know why they did it or I should say didn't stop it.

As we walked past a few reporters tried to stop us and ask where we were going. Abel stopped, sighed and turned to one, "We don't have a place to stay so why don't you take that nice camera you have and shove it up your ass before I do it for you." With that he shoved the camera back before walking off. "Bastards all of you, just looking for the next story to jerk off to." With that he flipped them off and jogged to catch up with us.

"Feel better?" Ludwig asked with a slight smirk.

"Actually yeah I feel a hell of a lot better." Abel grinned before letting out a slight cough, "Shit I caught their bullshit."

At that I laughed, "Aww I'm sure you'll be okay Abel it's not too contagious."

"Only if you believe them." He said with a sheepish grin. I couldn't help but notice him silence another cough. I should have noticed it sooner but we had more pressing matters so we walked towards where we hoped it would be somewhat safe. With the two hundred dollars in my pocket I touched the cross around my neck praying to anyone that would listen. It was a simple prayer that I would say often for the years to come.

Lord watch over my brother, may my Uncle have a piece of mind and let my family stay healthy and my child grow. And please let my mother know I still love her.

It would bring me comfort when I needed it the most and for the days to come it's all I really could do.


	17. Pink Tulips

Of all the places for them to pick they picked a large city, rent would be cheaper they told me but I still would have been anywhere else but in one of those rundown apartment buildings. But then I really didn't have much of a choice with my child growing every day and Abel getting sicker we'd have to find a spot where at least I could care for him while the other two tried to find work. Our home was a small two room apartment on the fifth floor of a large building on the north side of the city. It was called Hell's kitchen, namely for how hot, humid and loud it could get on a summer day. It wasn't the safest place but I knew which streets to avoid when I had to go out. Rent was very cheap and for the most part it's all that mattered.

Gilbert and I shared one room and Ludwig had the other, Abel stayed on a worn couch in the small living room turned his bedroom. He was stubborn, never once did he want to go see a doctor even if we had the money he would have simply shake his head. "If I die I'm fucking dying here." He would say with a frown, "Those bastards couldn't cure a fucking cold even if you held their hand." He'd grumble as I laid a cold cloth on his forehead on one afternoon.

"Well there really isn't a cure for a cold." I said with a smile as I sat next to him, the other two wouldn't have been home for another few hours and I was starting to get worried about this man who had been laying on the couch for over four months now. "Now are you hungry?"

"Can I get a beer?"

"That's not food smartass." He pouted at me but I won't budge, "Eggs? Toast?...I'm not getting you beer so stop with the puppy dog look cause only Gabi can do that." At the sound of her name the German Shepard raised her head before she gave a wide yawn and fell back asleep on her master's jacket that he had left for her.

He again sighed as if almost defeated, "Alfred I'm not hungry and all I want is a beer…please?"

After I thought it over I nodded, "On one condition. I will make chicken noodle, you will eat it and then you will have half of a beer." His eyes light up instantly so I stood to find a can of soup that I was sure I had bought the other day. To my annoyance we were out and while I didn't want to I hoped someone in the building might have a can of soup. "Abel I'll be right back okay?" I said as I went to the door, "And I swear to god if I get back and all the beer-" I stopped seeing him already asleep. So quietly I slipped out and down the hall, I didn't know our neighbors that well but I knew of a few Omegas on the third floor.

I knocked on a few doors to find no answer so I continued until I reached the second. The door opened revealing a slightly shorter brown haired Omega woman with deep green eyes. "Yes?" She said in a slight European accent that I couldn't quite place, "How can I help you?" She asked looking me up and down.

After I gave her a small smile I answered, "This is strange but I was hoping you had…a spare can of soup? The moment I go shopping I'll give you one or I have money up at my apartment if you'd rather have that." She cocked her head at me so I continued, "Possibly Chicken noodle?"

"Are you sick?" She asked with slight concern looking down at my swollen stomach.

I rubbed it feeling a small kick in return, "Not me, um an Alpha I live with has been sick for a few months now and well…" I blushed slightly as I looked down. I knew how that statement could be taken and while I wanted to correct it I could hear my mother chuckling telling me to be quiet.

She nodded as closed the door behind her, "Why don't you take me to him?"

"Uh?" I blinked as she smiled.

"It's okay I'm a nurse or I was so," She shrugged slightly and while I wanted to ask further I knew there's be time for that later.

"Oh than yeah it's this way." I turned around and started my trek back up the stairs hating that of all the damn floors ours had to be so high up especially with my back constantly in pain and my ankles by then throbbing with every step I took. "Can I ask you a question?" I asked looking back at the older woman wondering what she would think of it.

"Go ahead."

"Well…" I inhaled, "I can't pay you much but um…"

While I left off she quickly knew what I wanted to ask but then again I probably wasn't the first Omega to ask her. "You need a midwife?"

"Yeah but like I said I could pay you somehow, Miss…"

"Elizaveth and you, dear?"

As I reached the door I answered, "Alfred and the Alpha should still be asleep and his name is Abel." I opened the door to find Abel still lying on the couch but now awake again just staring at a spot on the floor. "How are you feeling?"

He looked up at me; I knew he didn't have much energy as he turned back to stare into space, "Shit." He said simply as Eliza sat next to him, "Hi?"

"Hello." She answered as she took his chin to look into his eyes, from there she checked everything as all the while she had a look of concern on her face. After what seemed like ten minutes she sighed, "Abel…"

"I know." He said as he wheezed. "I've known for weeks now…"

Eliza took his hand and squeezed it while I looked on in slight confusion and true fear, "What have you know?" She asked. But while she said it I'm sure it wasn't because she doubted him, it was more like she was seeing if he understood what was going to happen to him.

"That I want a beer…" He said with a weak attempt at a smirk.

As I started to sigh Elizaveta answered, "Sweetie if he wants a beer I don't see why not."

"But…" It would be years for me to understand why this was so important, why all he wanted was a simple beer. Now I know it wasn't all he wanted but it brought him closer to his brothers, to his past and in the coming weeks I'd give him a few during the days. It did seem to ease his pain and every once in a while he'd give me a soft smile. I soon came to know what was wrong with him. My friend was dying.

**A/N: This chapter title is a little different since I couldn't find another flower that meant sick so instead it means caring. **


	18. Forget-me-nots

I didn't want to admit it to myself, nor do I think would Gilbert believe it for a long time but slowly he came to accept it. But for me, I felt it was God once again being a complete and utter asshole. It wasn't fair and while I knew life had never been exactly fair I still wished that he for once wouldn't take someone away from me. Abel had become a kind of big brother to me so to watch him slowly waste away was so painful. While it hurt I tried not to show it much but Abel could tell.

"Alfred?" He started as the blue eyed Alpha watched me clean one morning. "Can you come sit with me, please?"

I looked over my shoulder as I put the last of the dishes away, "For a few minutes." I said as I mentally made a list of the errands I'd still have to do that day most of which would have taken me out of the apartment for more than a few hours. After closing the cupboard door I walked over and managed to sit on the edge of the couch since by that time I was nearly nine months along.

As I shifted to get comfortable he rested his hand on my stomach, "Why don't you get a chair to sit in?"

"I can only stay for a few minutes but when I come back I'll sit with you all night." I answered as I moved his hand slightly so he could feel my child kick.

In that moment I saw his face light up and in the first time in days he sat up in pure awe, "He's as strong as you kid." He said with a wide grin.

It was a strange nickname he decided to call me in the last few months but I didn't mind. "Yeah he is." I chuckled patting my belly softly, "He just loves moving and I'm sure he'll look a lot like his father."

"No he'll look just like you." He said with a lazy smile as he finally moved his hand away, "He'll be a good little pup I'm sure of it." He rested his head on my shoulder and while I had a lot to do I knew they could wait for a little while.

While most would have shook their heads at me for kissing his temple or cuddling up to him my instincts were tell me to hug him and never let go. At the time I thought it was my motherly hormones mixed with that fact that it was just about to rain but looking back it was for other reasons. "Do you want a beer?"

He chuckled weakly as he shook his head, "Not this time but maybe later, but have you wondered what Heaven is?"

It was a strange question but compared to our normal conversations this didn't strike me as out of the ordinary. "Well it's a place where you go when you die…"

"No Kid I think that's called Hell." I wasn't sure if he was joking or not as he asked again, "I mean what would your Heaven look like?"

"Oh." I had never thought of it before and truly was still confused about what he was asking so I leaned back as the rain outside started to fall, "Well what would yours look like?"

Abel could see through my question but he looked up at the ceiling as he spoke, "My heaven would be the summer around ten years ago, no longer than that…fifteen years ago. Around twilight when the fireflies would start coming out." He inhaled slowly as tears formed at the edges of his eyes, "I would catch those little fuckers all night until Dad yelled for me to come back inside than I would put them in a jar for my little brother Tino." He was in a different time and place. It was as if a movie was playing in his head of every good memory he ever had. "He would just stare at them before racing to show the others. Oh and then Emil who was like only five would look over clutching his little stuffed bird and ask…" His voice caught in his throat as a tear streamed down his face.

Only then did I take his hand, "Ask what?" I said softly knowing that whatever happened to him and his family cut him to the core.

"He asked me to get him a jar too." He squeezed my hand, "He wanted his big brother to catch them for him." He swallowed hard, "And I would because I loved him and I knew than that he did too, they all did." His grip tightened slightly, "Where did all that go?"

I didn't know what to say to him so I said the only thing that I could think of, "I know they still love you, wherever they are."

He shook his head still looking above us, "They all hate me Alfred. Tino and Berwald I understand…" He clamped his eyes shut as if his memories suddenly turned on him, "And I told them I hated them back but I never meant it. They were my little brothers, they still are no matter what they say and I hope they'll be in my heaven…" His eyes gradually opened as the pillow below him started to show his tear stains. "Even if I don't deserve to see it I hope they make it to those lazy nights again."

Now I had to hold back the tears, "You're a good Alpha Abel." He didn't answer me for a long time so with one hand on my stomach I started to speak, "My Heaven would be a large house with a wraparound porch so on lazy summer days you could come visit me." Softly a smile grew on his face, "I'd have a huge yard for long football games on one end and a massive garden on the other so my Mom won't ever have to worry about us trampling her flowers." I laughed slightly before I saw the light slowly fading from his eyes, "Abel?"

"It sounds nice Alfred…"

"Y-Yeah." I managed to say as a lump grew in my throat. "And on nice days I'll come see you in your Heaven and I'd love for you to catch me a few fireflies while I was there."

"I'd love to Alfred…" He inhaled slowly, "Can I have that beer now?"

I smiled as I held him close, "You had it don't you remember?"

"Yeah…it was good." He muttered looking up into my eyes, "Thank you Alfred…" And with that he closed his eyes one last time.

My baby kicked as I slowly stood up, "You're welcome Abel." I leaned down and kissed his forehead before going for our neighbor's phone as Gabi let out a single howl. "Watch over him Mother…because he's a little loud but his heart is in the right place."


	19. Myrtle

While I want to say Abel's death was rare, he was just one in hundreds that were dying from a sickness the government had created. Not that they'd ever really admit it, because if they did well let's face it, it would mean those assholes would have to be honest with themselves and they were living in a fantasy world. It would be years more until someone finally would open their eyes to the hell but I'm getting off topic.

Abel's passing hurt all of us even Gabi would rest her chin on the couch and whine every so often before I or Ludwig would call her away. She would still look every so often at it and whine until I asked Gilbert to get rid of it, both for her own good and for mine. "It's alright Alfred." Eliza remarked a few days before my pup was due, "He's in a better place." She said with a warm smile as she got out her note book.

"I know it's just hard." I sighed as I leaned back in my kitchen chair. "So what did you want to see me about?" She only wanted to see me when Gilbert was at work, I could feel that the two knew each other but I didn't know exactly how. I didn't think they were lovers or mates but the thought still lingered in the back of my mind.

With a click of her pen she started down her list, she had to make sure I had everything prepared. When she finished she looked up with a smile, "Do you have any questions?"

Before I could stop myself I opened my mouth. "Were you and Gilbert mated?" My eyes went wide as I prepared to see her stand and leave.

But instead she laughed as if I said the funniest thing, "Wow. No honey we were never mated." It actually took her a moment before she wiped away a tear, "We did grow up together but I was never interested in an Alpha like him."

"What do you mean an Alpha like him?" I knew she didn't mean anything nasty by it but my hormones had me on edge.

She shook her head, "Nothing Dear. I mean he's headstrong and he can be rather…unique at times."

At that I nodded and when she asked if I had any more questions I shook my head, "Not really. I know it's gonna hurt like hell."

"Sometimes it does, sometimes it's a little easier." She smiled trying to ease my fear, "But we won't know until you go into labor and I'll help you through it." I was happy to have her. Hospitals weren't cheap and just a night could run us over five hundred dollars so while it would mean cleaning up the mess myself it would only cost me a few dollars in cleaning supplies.

The morning started off like any other except that one Gabi won't leave my side and I had this strange feeling deep in my stomach. It was like a small stomach ache mixed with a little nausea. "You feeling okay?" Gilbert asked me as he finished his eggs and fried potatoes.

I smiled as I cleaned my plate which I had barely touched, "Just tired really."

He stood and wrapped his arms around my chest as he kissed my cheek, "You sure? I could stay home." As he said it his arms went to my stomach and held me close to his chest. "I could use a day off just to spend time with my little Sparrow."

I chuckled as I returned his kiss, "Why don't you come home for lunch? I don't want you to miss a full day." I answered feeling a strong kick that nearly brought me to my knees. "Shit he's active today."

Ludwig stood quickly as Gilbert grabbed my arm, "West, go get Eliza."

"No I'm fine. It was just a kick." Truly I wasn't sure but I didn't want to worry either of them. So I stood up and kissed his jaw, "He's not coming just yet."

He looked me up and down with a look of doubt before he let out a sigh, "Okay I'll be home around two but West is coming home at noon." Ludwig didn't argue as he grabbed his jacket and kissed Gabi's nose good bye.

Alone with my mate he looked me in the eye, "Alfred if you're in labor you can tell me."

"I don't know really…" Slowly I sat down, "It doesn't feel like I am." I said mulling over all I was feeling since I woke up. "It's hard to explain but none of the other Omegas or Eliza said it would feel like this." That much I knew. All I had ever heard about was that it came quickly but I was very wrong. "So go." I said with a brave smile, "I'll be okay." I kissed him again, "Before you're late."

With a smirk he kissed me before he grabbed his jacket and kissed my stomach, "Fine but I'll be home soon Sparrow." He closed the door and I was alone with Gabi who was still clinging to me.

While I knew I should have lain down I couldn't get comfortable so I sat at the table just slowly rubbing my stomach. "Wait until Daddy gets home." I whispered, I didn't have a phone nor did I think I could have made it down to Elizaveta's apartment so it's really all I could do. Finally I went slightly stir crazy since I could only sit still for so long. So I started to stand only to receive a violently painful shock rocket up my body. I gasped as I all but collapsed, at that Gabi started to bark frantically. "Shit, shut up Gabi." I said as I grabbed at her collar as I tried to calm her down.

I held her tightly with one hand as I tried to stand back up using the table for support. "Shh!" I tried again, I don't know why I felt like I had to keep her quiet but it's all I focused on until I felt the pain again a few minutes later, "Ahh!" I screamed feeling a liquid rush down my legs. I still had been wearing just an old long t-shirt so when I looked down I knew exactly what it was. "Fuck…" I let go of Gabi as I tried to steady myself. She continued to bark and race around as the door opened.

I had never seen Ludwig's eyes grow so wide before. I knew it was the last thing he every imaged he would see coming home. "L-Ludwig." I managed before letting out another pained scream, "Get Eliza hurry!"

He was out the door in a flash and by the sound of his boots on the wooden steps he was flying. Meanwhile I braced myself for what I knew by then was a contraction but I was horrified that any moment I'd hear a wet thud on the tile below me. But I didn't want to lay down in the puddle nor was I sure I could get back up again if I did so as another contraction hit me I placed a hand down hoping that I didn't have to be the one to catch my baby.

As I screamed out again Eliza appeared in the door way with a few towels in her hands followed by curious or concerned Omega neighbors that had heard either my screams or Gabi's barks. "Alfred, try to-"

"He's coming right now!" I cut her off as I pushed hard my face soaked in sweat.

She disappeared below me for a moment before she cried out for me to push again. I quickly did what I was told and just as quickly as it started my pain was gone. I was left panting and drained but my only thought was to my baby. "Well," Eliza started as she wrapped a small bloody bundle up in her arms, "It's a little boy."

Slowly I sat back down as I stared in awe, "C-can I hold him?" My arms were already out stretched ready to take the whimpering newborn from her.

"Of course." Gingerly she handed him to me. He was red, wet and crying but he was mine.

I held him close to my chest as I cooed softly to him, "Shh its okay." I hummed as I kissed his forehead, "Mommy's right here." At the sound of my voice he looked up at me with bright blue eyes. Then when we cleaned him I found that he would have blonde hair. Abel was right, he looked just like me.

If you asked Ludwig about it he'd say I wasn't fazed by any of it by the fact that I sat in that chair nursing my son as I waited for Gilbert to come home. When in reality I was too weak to even move and it was all I could do from passing out really. Back in those times the Alphas would still chose the first born child's name and I was determined to know what my baby was going to be named before I fell asleep.

Eliza was admit that his name would be Gilbert Jr. as well as Ludwig was slightly worried but he thought it would be more along the lines of Robin. I on the other hand knew he had been thinking long and hard about it. The moment he saw me after pushing through some of the omegas still at the door he ran to my side. "Sparrow…" He started as he kneeled down to meet my eyes. He touched my cheek with his hand moving away some of the hair matted down with his thumb, "Now what was that about not being in labor?" He smiled looking down at his son like a proud father. "Does he have a name yet?"

"Well now he will." I answered carefully handing over my baby. "So?" I looked over at Eliza who had the birth certificate ready.

Gilbert held him out for a moment looking him up and down before kissing his nose, "Cain Beilschmidt." He said simply before he handed him back to me and signed the certificate.

After a few more minutes he helped me into bed. It was a name none of us where prepared for or expected but as I fell asleep my mind drifted back to a story I had once heard as a child and my heart swelled with joy. Gilbert had always called him a bastard but I knew how much he had cared for Abel so while he'd never admit it he had named our first son, Cain in memory of Abel.


	20. Golden Rods

I slept as well as I could, awaking every so often to feed my son. He was a good little boy with a damn good set of lungs. But eventually I would return back to my spot in bed still slightly warm as Gil would once again wrap his arms around my chest.

Slowly the sun's rays peeked into our room as I laid there watching Cain sleep in his bassinet just below the window. Out of all the hell that had happened in the past few years I felt like it made up for much of it and I was happy. It was then that I noticed Gabi asleep next to the wooden crib. She was curled up around it and as Cain would whimper she'd raise her head and bump it with her nose making the bassinet rock slightly drifting Cain back to sleep. I smiled warmly as Gilbert chuckled as he kissed the nap of my neck, "Well we found ourselves a pretty good babysitter."

That German Shepard loved my little boy and was never far from him whether it be napping, bath time or sharing dinner with each other they did it together. I think it's one of the reasons why Ludwig never moved out. It would mean he would either have to leave Gabi behind or take Gabi away from Cain, both he could never do. But then I doubt he'd want to leave his young nephew either, he like his canine companion adored Cain. He'd hold my son every chance he could and when I went into heat he'd offer to take off to watch my baby.

Cain had the brightest blue eyes I had ever seen and his hair turned into a little mess of dirty blonde hair by the time he was sixteen months old. He would 'talk' nonstop and most he said was Doggie this or Doggie that. His little world was perfect in his eyes as long as he had us and of course his little doggie.

Little did he know that his world was going to get a bit bigger, in fact the day I found out I was pregnant again was the day the war ended. It came on the news as we all sat around the living room as Cain played in Gilbert's lap. The reporter smiled at the camera before simply saying, "The war is over."

It wasn't this grand thing like in years past when news like this arrived. We didn't hug or kiss but simply sighed in relief that maybe things would get back to normal. What we got was a new surge of people mostly Alpha and Beta men into the city. Most if not all of them were ex-soldiers trying to find jobs or family after finding their homes gone. Others were wounded men and women that had nowhere else to go; many were missing a leg or arm from the fighting while others suffered from the hell they witnessed. They would sit at the corners and just stare but I could tell they weren't really there, they were damaged people and what was worse was no one cared. Most would simply walk past and ignore them while others would be little them. But actions made me sick to my stomach to see, it wasn't their faults and to know that my brother might be among them would bring tears to my eyes.

I still looked for him every chance I could take. I'd leave Cain with Eliza or Ludwig on his day off and search for my brother in one of the many missions popping up around the city. I'd be told the same things, that if they'd see him they'd let me know or that he wasn't there so try another. I never received a single call so by the time I was four months along I had all but given up hope.

It was a chilly day and I had hoped it wasn't going to snow since I had not only Cain with me but Gabi as well. It had been a long day for me since both men had been at work I had to do a bit of the shopping but Cain wouldn't stop screaming since I told him Gabi couldn't go. So like a good Mother I let the dog come too. Thankfully I knew the shop owner so it wasn't too much of a hassle but going home was another story as I held a few bags in my hand as Cain sat on my arm as I had Gabi's leash wrapped around the other. Cain was talking my ear off about this and that while Gabi won't stop pulling at her leash. I'd pull her back and glare down at her like Ludwig would do in hopes getting her to behave only to receive a cry from the dog. "Mommy mean." Cain said with a nasty glare at me after watching me pull her back.

"What? Mommy's not mean." I answered back as I prayed for the bus to appear soon.

His little gaze sharpened and I was instantly reminded of his uncle, "Mean to Gabi. Mean Mommy."

While today I know it wasn't personal and he didn't say it to hurt me but at the time it stung. "Baby Mommy's not mean." I forced a smile as I kissed his forehead before nearly losing my balance as Gabi tugged at my arm. "Damn it, now stop!" I yelled down at her before Cain burst into tears. Instantly I regretted it as I tried to calm him down only to have him scream louder.

I didn't know what to do and with everyone staring at me I decided to walk towards home instead. It was the way Gabi had been pulling anyway and I thought by the time we made it home Cain would either have calmed down or been so exhausted that he would just fall asleep. Soon his screams turned to a hiccupped sniffle so with still a dozen blocks to go I started to hum to him. When I got half way I stopped to let Gabi pee on a sign so I started to sing a song I knew all too well, "Hush my sweet child, darling boy. I'll always be with you until I'm no more. The angels smile down at you and on me. And until we're united again you will see. That I love you as you love me."

Finally Cain laid his head on my shoulder as I kissed his tiny nose. "Sorry Mommy…" He said quietly as he snuggled up to my chest.

I chuckled quietly as laid my cheek on top of his head, "Mommy's sorry too baby."

What I heard next nearly made me drop all my bags, "A-Alfred?"

My head whipped around so fast I'm sure I nearly gave myself whiplash, "Matthew!?" I cried out as I nearly startled Cain again. My eyes widened at what I saw. Matthew was sitting alone on the sidewalk in nothing but what I'm sure he was discharged with. His jacket was worn and barely kept him warm against the late fall chill, his shoes were caked in mud and his hair was wildly long but what shocked me the most were his eyes. They were wrapped in blood incrusted gauze and it was clear from where I was standing that they hadn't been changed in weeks if not months. "Mattie? Is that you?" I asked while I was certain it was I didn't know if he was the same Alpha that was dragged from our home over four years before.

Instantly he gave me a smile I had never forgotten. "Yeah it's me." Slowly he reached out for my hand and I quickly gave him the one that held Gabi's leash.

I felt the tears welling up in my eyes as I hugged him the best I could. "God damn it, I missed you Bro." I held him tighter as I kissed his cheek, "Dude I looked everywhere for you!"

He laughed as he smiled, "I missed you too." He said as he sniffed the air, "Did you mate?"

"Yeah I did and it's kinda a long story." I looked to Cain who stared at the man before him in pure confusion in fact it was the most quiet he had ever been, "I have my first in my arms and he's a little boy named Cain."

"First?" He said in shock before he reached out feeling my slightly swollen stomach, "Is that?"

I rested my hand on his as I smiled, "Yep that's my second and she'll be here in about five months." After a moment I took his hand again and helped him to his feet knowing instantly that he was coming with me. "Do you want help with your things?"

He shook his head as he felt for his brown backpack by his feet. "I have it but…"

"They won't mind. Hell they know I've been looking for you." I said as I took his hand again and started to walk. We were nearly home before I dared to ask, "Are you…"

"Yeah." He answered quietly, "I'm blind."


	21. Orchids

Before we walked up to my apartment I quickly knocked on Eliza's door. Sadly according to her mate she had been out for the moment so we slowly made our way to the apartment as I hoped that Eliza would join us soon. Cain wouldn't take his eyes off of his uncle as he clung tightly to my neck. I could tell he was slightly afraid of the new stranger so I wasn't surprised that when I did let him down he took off like a shot towards my bedroom with Gabi close behind. "Do you want to take a shower, Bro?" I asked as I put the groceries away before they could go bad. "I could help you if you want…"

He turned away ashamed, "Thanks but I think I can manage." It came out as a weak whisper and I wondered what happened to him to make this change. Sure he had always been quiet but when it was the two of us he was never like this.

"Okay." I said as I escorted him to our bathroom and took his jacket off. I had to catch the gasp seeing the wide deep scars and bruises that lined my brother's arms. "Damn…"

One of his hands grasped at his arm and sighed, "Yeah it only probably looks bad but it doesn't hurt that much." He said with a weak smile as he started to peel off his clothes. I hoped he would wait but finally the question I had been dreading came out of his mouth, "So where is Mom?"

After all these years I had thought of what I'd tell him, nothing ever sounded right and so I closed my eyes and let my heart speak, "She's home…"

His head shot up like a rocket as he scrambled for my shoulder, "What do you mean she's home…?"

"I-"

"Alfred?"

"I…I'm sorry Mattie but she's gone." He sank to his knees as his hands fell to the tile with a small thud, he wouldn't tell me then but years later he'd admit that the only reason he kept going for those years was to see me and our mother again. It's all he had so when he found out that it had been in part in vain it nearly crushed him.

I held him close as he was quietly crying for the loss of our mother. Slowly after a few minutes I helped him into the bath tub and helped him wash up seeing more scars that littered his body. I knew exactly what he'd want to hear so as I grabbed a towel I spoke again, "She didn't suffer."

"How?" He said his voice slightly cracking but at least louder.

"She fell while we were traveling. It broke her neck but I was with her when she died." I lied the best I could as I hoped he won't catch any of it.

Finally after letting it sink in, he rose and took the towel from me, "Where is she um buried?" He whispered coarsely.

"Under a laurel tree in the mountains, I buried her myself and I'm sure I could find my way back."

"I want to see her…"

"And you will I promise." I led him into Ludwig's bedroom and handed him a pair of pants and a white shirt that he could borrow. I hoped they would fit but just in case I handed him a belt. As he changed Eliza knocked on my door. She was surprised to see him or maybe that I had found him after all I had told her. "Mattie this is a friend of mine. Do you mind if she checks your eyes and shit?"

"And shit? Well glad to know that you're still swearing with kids running around." Mattie said with a light laugh as he carefully sat in the chair I slid out for him. It was strange, he almost seemed nearly unfazed by the situation but it might have been shock for all I knew. "Hello Miss.."

"Eliza, Dear." She said with a sympatric smile. "You must be Matthew." She said as she took out her scissors and started to snip away at the gauze around his eyes and head.

"Yeah…" He whispered again. I could tell he was uncomfortable but I also knew that it was for his own good that she saw what we were dealing with. Blindness I could bare, anything else he might have had that could kill him I wouldn't have been able to deal with. Call it shallow or selfish but I didn't want to see anyone else I cared for die.

She took her time and after feeding Cain I sat and watched her delicate fingers nimbly remove them and the patches covering his eyes. They were brown and crusty from his tears and blood but once they were removed it was even clear to me that if he ever did see again it wouldn't be more than blurred or shadowy objects. His eyes were a dull milky blue that seemed almost alien like and his eye lids were still red and slightly puffy from whatever chemical warfare had destroyed his eyes. While I was shocked and truly mortified by my brother's condition Eliza merely sighed as she shook her head, "It's not good I'm afraid." It was all she really wanted to say as she washed out his eyes and covered them again. "I'll change them every week if you want and I'll pray for you too."

I spoke up for him knowing that this wasn't new for him in fact he was probably told the same thing a few times over. "Thanks Eliza." I started before smiling, "If you want next time you can show me how to do it and I can do it from then on."

"Al, you don't have too…"

"Yeah but I want to." I answered as my brother turned towards me with a smile but those eyes...they made me shutter. Only now will I say that staring into those eyes actually gave me nightmares for a few nights to come.

I would wake up with a start only to have Gilbert hold me close and pull me back down to the bed as he hushed and hummed quietly. He won't ask me what was wrong and just as I would fall asleep I would hear a whimper in the darkness. It wouldn't be Cain but my brother sleeping in the living room. Those times he wouldn't wake up while other times he'd jolt awake screaming his head off.

While I was afraid that Ludwig or Gilbert would throw him out they never once brought it up. He was as much their brother as he was mine. They were protective of him and would even sit with him when he would have a flashback. Ludwig especially would hold him tightly as my brother tensed up while Mattie would then whimper or scream that the 'bastards' were coming. Gabi would take on the job when Ludwig was at work, she would touch his leg or hand with her nose before licking his hand and fingers until his body relaxed and he let out a sigh of relief. He wouldn't tell me what the flashbacks were of but only not to worry about them but I did and nothing he would say would change that. He was my brother after all and I hated to see him hurting in silence. Maybe again I'm being selfish or probably the better word might be arrogant but I never said I was a perfect little Omega.


	22. Gardenia

It's a strange thought isn't it? What makes a perfect little Omega anyway? Often times I wonder if female Betas have the same problems that Omegas do. We bare the children, we care for the households, we have to listen to our Mates and pretend at times that our opinions count in society when in reality we are powerless. So it boggles my mind how my mother could do it on her own in this kind of world when at nearly eight mouths along with my second I was nearly ready to give up.

The sun had been beating down on me as I scurried the best I could down the street towards Gilbert's work. He had forgotten his lunch again and after doing this for two weeks I had the idea that not only was he doing this on purpose but that he enjoyed making me run all the way down to the work site. I made it just as the lunch bell rang to see about a dozen large Alpha men in torn jeans and white shirts. What I hated was the moment I saw a few of those torn jeans I instantly wanted to not only clean them but fix the tears. What had I become? When had I become so domesticated?

Since I'd been there so many times before I knew exactly where to go. On that day none gave me a wicked lustful stare or threw cat calls my way like they normally did. Maybe they could tell I wasn't exactly in the mood or Gilbert had told them to stop. Either way I found my mate sitting calmly at his desk waiting for me, "Bluebird,"

"Gil this is getting fucking old now." I said in a stern voice not caring who was in earshot.

For a moment he looked up at me in shock, "What?"

"Don't give me what, you know exactly what you fucking asshole." I glared at him as I threw his lunch on the table and turned to walk away.

"Excuse me?" He said in a surprisingly booming voice before he rose to his feet. "What is this sudden attitude?"

"Oh attitude? No this is just me being me cause somebody decided to be a complete dick for two weeks." I stood my ground as I felt my baby kick hard, "Tomorrow you better fucking remember your lunch or else you'll go hungry."

That look is something I will never forget, I swear he was going to hit me but instead he calmly closed the door and pulled out his chair, "Sit."

"I'd rather stand." The only reason I said it was because for once in a long time I was afraid, I knew I had gone too far but really I was just stressed out and hormonal.

His eyes narrowed slightly, "Damn it I said, sit."

I couldn't do it, my ego won't let it happen so instead I sat at the edge of his desk. "Okay now what?" I asked as I crossed my arms over my chest.

He let out a deep annoyed sigh as he copied my actions on the desk behind him, "Alfred that was not awesome." He said simply looking me in the eyes, "I don't care how upset you are-"

Instantly I cut him off, "I know you don't care because if you did-"

"Let me finish!" He stood again never once did he lose eye contact with me until he was mere inches away from my face, "One I never made you come down here but I thought it would be nice for you to, two to get out of the house for a little while and three that you'd like to see me more than twenty minutes in the morning and three hours at night." While his voice was firm I didn't hear an ounce of anger. "Now if it pissed you off so fucking much you should have said something or not even showed up."

A chuckle wanted to escape but I forced it down, "You know I had to. You're my Alpha and I'd be a shitty mate if I did that."

He let out a loud laugh at that, "Or really? And that little rant a moment ago was really just what you saying you love me?"

"Um…" My face grew hot as I looked down at my stomach as I rubbed it gently, "Yeah?"

"Yeah?" He answered back as he took my hand, "Well than I love you too."

I nodded as I kissed his forehead; I knew he forgave my little outburst but deep down I wasn't ashamed I did it. I would feel bad later when I left hearing the snickers and side remarks about Gilbert not being able to 'handle' me. There was no doubt in my mind that if I had done that to any other Alpha I would have been not only hit but 'put in my place'. As I took my long walk home I let out a sigh, knowing that he'd be made fun of for days if not weeks to come and it was my fault. That hurt far more than any punch he could have thrown.

So the next morning after not sleeping much the night before I handed him his breakfast, "Do you want me to pack a lunch?"

The other two stopped eating for a moment unaware of what happened the day before. Gilbert shrugged as he took a bite out of his toast, "That's up to you Bluebird."

The ball was in my court and we both knew it so I opened the fridge and made him a quick lunch. But before I handed it to him I wrote a quick message on a sticky note and wrapped it around a small box of Peeps. If he actually ever ate the marshmallow birds I don't know but I knew they made his face light up. So I put them in the bag before handing it to him, "Have a good day." I said simply as I kissed his cheek as the two brothers left.

Mattie stood as he picked up his plate, "What did you do?"

"Nothing." I answered back too quicky.

"Uh huh."

"Oh damn it don't give me that." I snapped as he gave me a slight smirk, "Why don't you go take Gabi for a walk?"

"So you can sulk?"

"So you and that dog can get some exercise." It was a poor excuse but I knew he hated being cooped up in the apartment feeling useless. So I handed him Gabi's leash as Cain whimpered quietly from his high chair. "You're doggie will be back."

Cain gave out another cry before Matthew spoke up, "Gabi is going to help me for a little bit than we'll be back with some ice cream." His smile widened as he leaned down slightly to where my son was sitting, "How does that sound?"

While he didn't understand much, Cain knew exactly what that word meant. "Kay." He said with a wide grin, "Nilla!" He said quickly, "Nilla, Nilla!"

"Okay my little bear I'll get you Vanilla." I knew he'd make such a good father one day whether he realized it or not. Sure many won't look past his blindness but I was certain one day an Omega would and when he or she did they would see an amazing Alpha. He kissed the top of his nephew's head then motioned for Gabi to follow and out they went.

While he thought I was going to just sit and sulk it was far from the truth. In reality I was anxious more than anything and I found myself unable to keep still. I hoped above anything that he would read my little note and understand what I was trying to say. That no matter what I said to him I loved him.


	23. Cactus

He did understand and later that night when my mate returned he brought with him a little yellow stuffed bird. "It's for the baby." He said with a wink as he handed it to me.

It put a smile on my face as I took the silk feathered bird, "Aww Gil you didn't have too."

"He didn't I did." Ludwig quietly said as Gil gave him a dirty look. I wasn't sure if he was kidding or not but either way I had to laugh.

"Well thanks both of you then." It was just too tempting so I kissed Ludwig's cheek before kissing Gil's.

His face reddened to a shade of pink I have never seen on him and I thought it must be why Gil loves to do this to me, because it's so amusing. After a moment he cleared his throat, "You're welcome." He said with a soft smile. "And that's not the only thing."

"Oh?" I asked as I picked up Cain as he tugged at my pants leg, "What else could there be?"

Ludwig turned to his older brother at that point, "We're moving."

"When?"

"After the baby's born."

"Where?"

"Someplace bigger."

"How?"

"We raised enough money."

"Why?"

At that point Mattie sighed, "Al, stop it."

"Why?" This time it came with a smirk as he turned his head my way. "You won't hit a pregnant omega would you?"

"Then I'll wait to hit you." It came with a smile that I hadn't seen in a long time. "Because I have time and when you least expect it I'll smack you upside the head."

At that point I knew he was kidding so I played along, "Aww but if you do that you won't be able to come with us."

"Can I keep Gabi?"

Before I could say anything Ludwig intervened, "No, Gabi and you will come too." We couldn't help but noticed that he said Gabi's name first or that when she heard her name her tail started wagging. I could tell by his face that he wasn't amused as much as the rest of us were or so I thought, "Now Gilbert on the other hand…" He said as we all turned to the albino eating the macaroni and cheese on the stove with his fingers. "We'll see…"

It was as if my mood had shifted after that, in fact I think all of our attitudes changed for the better. We would be going somewhere safer and farther away from the city. I had grown to like the city but I was ready to be someplace that I could breathe and have my freedom from those four walls.

I was in especially high spirits one day a few weeks later. We were all sitting around the kitchen as I tried to get Cain to eat his dinner. Funny how I always remember the times we were eating the clearest but that might have been because it's what I found we did the most together.

He was talking about what he and his father had done earlier that day at the park. It was so cute and I could tell by how theatrical he could be with his arms that he would a little version of me but I also had a feeling that my oldest was destine to be an Alpha. "Aww and then what did Daddy and you do?" I said as Gabi whined at my feet. I ignored her completely as Cain answered me.

In fact it was a few minutes before I noticed the others had stopped what they were doing and looking at me with slight concern. Even Mattie had stopped as he sniffed the air. "Al, maybe you should go lay down…" He started as Gilbert took the food out of my hand and laid it on the table.

"Why?" I asked before feeling a familiar feeling in my stomach, "O-oh that's why…"I inhaled slowly as Mattie went to the door to get Eliza. Carefully with Gilbert's help I stood up only for our son to let out a cry. He was clearly scared so I leaned back down and kisses his cheek, "It's okay my little Dude. Mommy will be right back." I always called him that whenever he was upset and it always made him feel better. Even today I still call him my little dude.

His eyes watered as he took my shirt and balled it into his little hands, "Mommy…"

Every fiber of my being wanted to pick him up and take him into the room with me but I wasn't sure if that was the best thing to do. But I couldn't just leave him that upset so I picked him up and kissed his cheek, "No don't cry my little Dude. You're gonna play with Uncle Ludwig for a little bit then Mommy will have a little surprise for you." As I said it I handed him over to his Uncle, "Right Uncle Ludwig?"

Ludwig was more than happy to take his little nephew, "Yeah." He smiled down at my son as he held him close to his chest, "In fact I think we should have some fun at the park, hmm? Maybe with Gabi and her sticky friend?" When Cain managed a weak nod I made a quick retreat for the bedroom.

My mate helped me into bed and it was actually a very unique sight. I had never seen him so flustered and nervous. His face was bright red and dripping with sweat well before I felt another contraction. "Do you need anything?" He asked, his voice dripping with concern.

"No we're okay." I said with a wide smile as I tried to calm him down. "But are you okay? You can wait outside if you want to."

He gave me a stunned look as if I just slapped him, "I missed the first one I'll be damned if I miss this one." With that he gave a soft sigh before slowly sitting with me. "Besides it's not like I'm going to faint or anything."

"You say that now…" I watched as he rubbed my belly slowly in circles that did manage to ease some of the pain I was feeling. He wasn't going anywhere so when Eliza did walk in and ask him again I said he could stay.

While my first labor was painful it didn't last long so when I pasted my four hour mark I was about to strange my mate. My contractions were long, slow and showed no signs of letting up. "Bluebird, do you want some water?" Gil asked as he pulled his hand out of my death grip.

When I turned my head to tell him to fuck off I heard crying in the next room that broke my heart, "No but go get Cain please."

He looked at Eliza for guidance on whether to or not as she checked me again, "I don't see why not." She said as she lowered the blanket, "You still have a few hours to go anyway."

I let out a pained moan as I laid my head back on my pillow dreading those few hours to come. As I was in the middle of thinking of ways to kill Gilbert for the hell I was in a small voice drew me back, "Mommy sick?"

As Gilbert chuckled I sat up before taking him into my arms, "No little dude I'm okay." I kissed his nose as he snuggled up into my chest. He had only been away from me for four hours but it felt like a life time for both me and my son. "Mommy's just…" I stopped as I looked over at Eliza for answers when she smiled at me I told him what came to me, I wasn't sure if he'd understand but I would try anyway. "Mommy is having a baby."

While Gil gave me a confused look Cain cocked his head, "Baby?"

"Yeah." I said as I looked down at my stomach, "You're gonna be a big brother." While he'd understand the statement perfectly later on at the time he just nodded as he yawned. "Well first you're gonna sleep." I said with a light laugh.

"No." Cain whined as he curled up into a warm spot next to me.

As I kissed his temple I hummed quietly to him, "Yes baby." A contraction hit me hard but I refused to let him see my pain. Even after he was asleep I hummed a song I knew all too well and when Gilbert went to scoop him up I shook my head, "Let him sleep. He's out cold."

"But what if he wakes up to you…"

"Giving birth?"

"Well yeah."

Now Eliza answered for me, "Gil, he's so young he won't remember any of this but let him sleep a little. Like I said he's nowhere near close."

"Why did you have to remind me of that?" I quietly groaned as I watched my baby boy sleep soundly. "Do you think it's another boy?" As I said it I shifted feeling the pain surge up my back, "Eliza."

She only checked for a moment before she poked her head up, "Gil, hand Cain off to one of his uncles because this one is ready to come out."

"You said a few hours?"

"Well the baby has other things in mind."

It took nearly two more hours of just pushing before I finally felt a rush of relief. I was dripping in sweat and I was sure I had nearly broke Gilbert's hand in the process but when I heard that small cry I couldn't help but smile. "Is it a boy?" I asked weakly almost ready to pass out.

"Nope not this time." She said with a warm smile before handing me my baby girl. She had soft brown eyes and while I couldn't tell what color her hair would be I had almost knew it would be brown. "So what are you going to name her?"

As Gilbert took her from my arms I muttered the name softly, "Julia…"


	24. Hops

That should be it right? A sweet little story that ends right there where I have my own little house with a wraparound porch, large garden of my own, my brother by my side and two little angels. But then that would be lying and I've always hated liars.

The war that I thought had ended three years before decided to rear its ugly head again. This time no shots were fired but that didn't mean my heart didn't stop when I heard the news. I was home alone with the kids. We had been at the house for no more than five months and I was still trying to make it home. Just as I ushered Cain into the other room there was a knock on my door. So instead I picked him up and opened it to find an Alpha I never wanted to see again.

His cold eyes glared down at me as he forced a fake smile, "Hello Mrs. Beilschmidt." It felt as if he was mocking me as he said it, "Is your mate at home?"

"No he's not." I answered back in the same cold monotone as I put Cain down and shooed him away from the door. "Who wants to know?"

"May I come in?"

"No." It was so tempting to tell him to go fuck himself but I wanted to know why he was there first. So instead I closed the door behind him as I met him on the porch, "My daughter is asleep." I said as I crossed my arms, "So what do you want with my mate?"

He gave me a sick chuckle, "Actually I was looking for both Beilschmidt brothers." With that he handed me a sealed envelope, "They have thirty days to comply and if they don't well…I'll be back with a few of my men." He leaned over so he could whisper in my ear, "And I'll drag them out like I did your brother and your little mother won't be able to stop me."

At that moment my heart just stopped, "Y-You bastard…" Gridding my teeth I glared back at him with my fists clenched so tight my knuckled turned white. "Get the fuck off my porch."

How I wanted to beat that smirk off of his face as he just turned on his heels, "Have a nice day Mrs. Beilschmidt."

"Mr. Jones-Beilschmidt." I corrected as I watched him go, "And what was your name?"

"I never gave it to you." He said as he drove away.

Once he was out of sight with trembling fingers I opened and read what it had to say. The only thing that would escape my lips was one word. "No…"

The papers was clear, since Gilbert and the others went AWOL then left the country they had committed a federal crime against the government and the military. They could face up to thirty years in prison or worse…if they didn't give themselves up in the next thirty days they could instead face a firing squad.

Today it seems extreme but they were trying to make an example out of my mate. He wasn't the only one to leave but he was right when he told me hundreds had left before and after him. Why it had to be him I didn't know at the time but it will always remain unfair. Either way I'd lose him and the only way out was if he could prove to the court that he was justified in his actions. That though would mean a lot of time and money, neither we had at the time.

But while I was worried, Gilbert didn't want to show it. "Bluebird, we'll be okay." He said later that night as I rocked Julia. "We've gotten through worse."

"Gil they will lock you up for thirty years!"

"At the most, they could just send me for ten."

"How is that any better?" I sighed as I swayed back and forth as I tried to get my baby girl to calm down.

Gingerly he took her from my arms and kissed me, "Because it would mean only a decade away than three and she'd be ten instead of thirty. The same with Cain, he'll still grow up with a father." He cupped my cheek into his hand as he said it as he gave me a soft smile.

I took his hand and held it tightly, "Gil, I grew up without my father and I don't want that for our pups. They need an Alpha in their lives."

"They'll have your brother."

"It's not the same damn it."

"Bluebird…"

"No it's complete bullshit. Every bit of it!" I held tight to his hand as I tried my hardest not to scream out in frustration. "Hell I don't see why we don't make a race for the border."

At that he shook his head, "What would that solve? I could never come back here and for all we know they'd just drag me back and execute me."

That term or I should say that word made me shutter. "Than what the fuck do we do?"

He kissed me deeply before resting his forehead on mine, "We fight and we fight hard."


	25. White roses

How do you fight a system hell bent on ripping you apart at the seams? It was the question I asked myself every day for that month. After saying our goodbyes Gilbert and Ludwig walked into the local police station and turned themselves in just two days shy of the date. My heart sank low in my chest as my son held tightly to my hand. He didn't understand much of it but he knew that his father was leaving and might not be coming back.

My little Dude cried softly in my arms as Mattie held Julia, "Shh Cain it's gonna be okay. You have ta be strong for Daddy." I hummed knowing that while it wouldn't stop the pain at least it would comfort him. "He'll be home before you know it."

He let out a soft sniffle as he rested his head on my shoulder, "Be a hero Mommy?"

My smile was a mile wide as I held him close, "Yeah my little Dude. You're my hero." I kissed his head as a few others walked up those same steps. Some walked up alone; others had to give their last goodbyes while a few had to be dragged into the station. My heart went out to all of them, they were starting their lives and now they all had to press pause on everything.

"Al, let's go home." My brother whispered as he took my free hand as many other Omegas wept around us.

"Yeah…" I followed him as few made eye contact with us.

It was strange really; it was the first time that I really took notice how much I towered over the other omegas. I would see many of them later when we all crammed into a hot court room ten days later.

While Cain wanted to come I refused and opted to come alone. Even Mattie was confused as to why he couldn't come but I didn't want anyone to turn him into a pawn or example later on. So there I was sandwiched between two Omegas. One a very lively Italian man that couldn't quite sit still on my left and on my right a brown haired soft spoken man that seemed to have gone through hell by the look of his scars. They crisscrossed up and down both his arms and he would constantly tug at his sleeve as the rest around us would chatter.

I wanted so badly to ask but he answered me first, "I was a prisoner of war." He told me weakly when our eyes finally met. "I'm sorry, do you want me to move?"

Quickly I shook my head, "No I was just curious. Um name's Alfred." I gave him a smile as I reached out my hand for him to take.

"Toris." He answered in that same quiet voice as he shook my hand. "Is your Mate here?"

"Yeah. What about you?"

He looked over the crowed heads beyond us, "Mine was executed…"

I wasn't sure what to say to him but I wrapped my arm around his shoulder, "I'm sorry." I whispered coarsely, "Do you have a place to go?"

"I…You don't have to Alfred. I'm sure the last thing you need is maid."

A chuckle escaped my lips as I smiled, "I wasn't saying you had to be a live in maid. I was just asking if you have a place ta stay and you're more than welcome to room with me and my family for the time being." I really couldn't help myself, the omega had lost his mate and for all I knew he would soon if he already hadn't lost his home. "I won't take no for an answer really." I continued with a grin until he nodded slowly. It was off the wall but I knew Matthew wouldn't mind but what I was surprised about was what my other companion said.

"Would you have room for one or two more?" I heard in a happy Italian accent.

I won't lie that it didn't take me by surprise, "Uh I think I do Dude."

"Great because my friend needs a nice home…now that her brother has been well…" His smile disappeared as he let out a sad sigh.

"Yeah…was your mate arrested too?"

"Oh no I don't have a mate." As he said it his smile returned.

"Then you're here…"

"Oh I'm here for Natalia. She couldn't bear to watch these assholes parade her brother around so she asked me to sit in and tell her if anything bad happens. But my name is Feliciano but you can call me Feli." With that he took my hand and shook it wildly.

I was instantly drawn to the short man and his bubbly personality and for a moment I wasn't in that court house but soon a familiar voice brought me back, "Listen up! Be quiet because the judges resigning over this little circus have arrived and you all need to shut up or get out." He smirked my way as my stomach did a roll. How I wanted to stand up and punch him squarely in the jaw but I just sat there with my teeth clenched as I glared at him.

Slowly a small array of Alphas walked up onto the bench and while they all looked intimidating and powerful the icy blue eyed man that sat right in front of me sent shivers down my spine. I hadn't even hear him speak but I knew Gilbert was in trouble. His name was Berwald and he was the head judge in charge of deciding all of the ex-soldiers fates.

He scanned the room a few times before we managed to lock eyes. It was strange but I recognized something about those eyes as if I had somehow seen them before. But before it could click in my brain he looked away and didn't look my way the rest of the time.

It was simply day one after all…and there would be time for me to figure it out at least I prayed there would be.


	26. Foxtail Lilies

The first day dragged on and I didn't see any of the men supposedly on trial, it pulled at my heart not being able to see Gilbert. We had mated a week before he turned himself in and it was eating at me that I might be pregnant once again. I wasn't sure really, I thought it was simply because he was gone. A simple Omega fear but than my body knew differently.

Once the day drew to a close I followed Feli out, well more like he took my hand and forced me out as I took Toris' hand. Feli wouldn't stop talking as we finally walked down the stairs and pasted by the news cameras. "So Natalia should be around her somewhere." As he said it a woman about his height stood up from her spot on a wooden bench, "Oh here she is." He sang as he ran over and gave her a comforting hug.

Her blue eyes were distant and as she forced a smile she tugged at her navy blue dress, "Hello…" She muttered, "Is my brother?"

"They didn't have anyone come out. It seemed mostly for the people in the crowd and for the news guys out front." I said as I pointed back behind my shoulder. "By the way my name's Alfred and Feli told me you might be needing a place to stay."

She nodded as she looked up into my eyes, "It'll only be until my brother gets out."

"Oh course." I answered leading my small group away. My brother was not surprised when I went alone only to come back with three. What he was surprised about was the gracious hug he received from Feli.

He patted the shorter man's back gently, "Hello?"

"Hello, are you Alfred's brother?"

Matthew smiled as he nodded, "Yeah I am and I'm guessing you all need a room?"

"If there's room…" Toris started not able to take his eyes off my brother's.

"Yeah there's plenty of room." My brother said as he put his hand out for Toris to shake, "I'm Matthew."

I let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding in and soon I was showing our guests to their rooms. It would be tight but I couldn't let any of them sleep out on the streets. Hell I would have taken in another five or six in an instant if I had too.

Part of it was me wanting to be a hero and the other half was simply because I didn't want to be alone. How we'd make enough to stay in the home I had no idea, deep down I knew I'd either have to charge a rent or work myself. I choose the latter so on Saturdays and Sundays when the trial wasn't being held I would work as a cashier in a book store.

Although I was okay with my job what I wasn't okay with was that for a month we still hadn't seen any of the defendants. To say that I was worried would have been an understatement and I could feel the fear creeping into the walls of the court room from the other Omegas.

Natalia replaced Feli's spot next to me after a week. She won't say much but just hold my hand tightly, "Alfred…" She would whisper to me, "What if they killed them already?"

Quickly I would shake my head and kiss the top of hers as if she was my daughter, "Nah if they did that then they wouldn't be doing all this bullshit. Unless they really have nothing better to do than string us all along."

Just as I said it the side doors burst open as a few Alphas in arm and leg restraints waddled in. "Alfred." Natalia gasped as her grip tightened, "Oh god Ivan…"

As she called out his name a towering Alpha turned our way, his eyes were as cold as ice but he gave her a warm innocent smile. "Natalia you came."

That simple statement was enough to bring my companion to tears, "Ivan...what did they do to you?" She choked out as she held back a sob when she saw his face riddled with black and blue bruises.

While she sobbed quietly next to me, I on the other hand was on my feet the moment I saw my family, "What the fuck?" I screeched out as many turned to me, "Someone beat the shit out of my Alpha."

"Sit down." Berwald commanded as he hit his gavel on the wooden bench.

"Are you kidding me? Someone beat my Alpha and you're just gonna ignore that?"

"I said sit down or I'll have you removed."

"Fu-"

"Alfred, sit down." Gilbert interrupted as he stared at me.

Slowly I sat back down and let Natalia cling to me as she cried. I was seething with anger and rage at the sight of both of them. Ludwig had a swollen eye and his cheek was deep red while Gilbert's nose was clearly broken and his lips were so swollen I was surprised he managed that sentence at all. None of them deserved what had been done to them and for that day I glared wickedly at Berwald.

I had no proof who had done it but by the way he clearly ignored it I was certain he looked the other way. I barely listened to what was being said at that point as I tried to concentrate on my foe. Finally after what felt like hours he had the Alphas excused.

I knew it would be my only chance so again I stood up and reached out for my mate's cheek, "Gilbert."

"Bluebird I'll be okay."

"But Gil…"

"Sit down."

He smiled sheepishly at me before he turned back to the judges, "One second please, then he'll behave."

"Gil…" I whispered again as I dared to lean over and kiss him, "I…I'm…

I'll never forget but he looked me in the eyes and smiled, "I'm proud of you, Bluebird. Keep our family safe and I'll be out before the baby's born." He kissed my forehead before being ushered out, "I love you even if you still think I'm a Bastard." The doors shut on him as I slowly sank back into my seat unaware that this time the judge was watching me.

I wrapped my arm around Natalia and just held her tightly as most others walked out. Some omegas joined us until after an hour we too stood up and left. I didn't understand how he could have such optimism and hope when at the very moment he was being kicked in the ribs.

But then someone had to have hope…


	27. Iris

It was a low point but not my lowest point. No that would come a week later when after a long hard day at work mixed with the thought of seeing my battered mate the next day had let an idea creep into my head. It's something I never thought I'd be asking myself but in the dead of the night as I sat alone watching the moon rising above I thought it. Should I really have this child? Sure I'm not the only Omega to every think of that but as it entered my mind…it lingered more than I felt it should have.

My mate if he did survive the trial might not survive the first decade away much less the three others. Thirty years. Sure I had Mattie for support but I wanted him to break free himself and find his own family. So eventually I would have to raise three children alone, protect one beta girl and if the one I was carrying was to be another beta girl or an Omega it would mean protecting them as well. I couldn't watch both at one time, I'd surely lose one when my back was turned. Or worse like with my mother and Mattie they would be taken while I'm at work, never to be seen again.

It was something I couldn't bear; it was crushing my heart but that didn't stop my thoughts. Hell I had a plan already for what to tell my family but what would stop me was that I wasn't sure if I could live with myself. I could lie to them but I wouldn't be able to lie to myself.

Gingerly I laid my hand on my stomach, it was still flat but I swear I could feel tiny movement from below my palm; it might have been nothing but my mind already made it out to be a tiny heartbeat. "Shit…" I muttered softly as I curled up on my bed already hating myself, "Shit…"

"Hmm where did this language come from?" A gentle voice asked from the darkness around, "I swear your father must have had a hand in it."

Instantly I shot up and looked around wide eyed. It was impossible but I found myself calling out to the voice I thought I'd never hear again, "Mom?"

There in the moonlight she stood smiling at me, "Yes my mon ange."

Quickly I ran into her open arms and held her smaller frame close. I swear I could smell the iris neatly tucked behind her ear, "Mommy…" I choked out not caring if it was real or not.

She hummed quietly to me before kissing my cheek, "It's alright my Alfred."

"No it's not Mom. My mate is gone, Mattie's blind, I…I'm thinking of killing my kid cause I'm a selfish dick."

It was then that she slapped me. "Alfred!"

"Well it's true Mom. I'm fucking failing at this shit and I'm looking for a way out." It actually stung so I rubbed my cheek as I looked away. "I'm not you okay? I can't do this. I can fake it. Hell I can put on the smile and parade into that court room like those cameras want me to but I know I'm dying inside. I'm dying and I don't want my kids to suffer for it."

I hadn't heard that kind of sigh for a long time as she took my chin with her delicate fingers, "Alfred, look at me."

Slowly I met hers, "You are not failing baby." While I was prepared to disgust or anger I only saw compassion.

"Then why does it feel like I am?"

Her eyes shined brightly as if she had heard this all before, "Because you care, you have the weight of the world on your shoulders when it's not yours to bear alone. I know because I felt the same things." She took my hand and squeezed it tightly. "But I know you love your babies, all of them."

"I do love them." I answered softly as I wrapped my arms around my stomach. "How did you do this? You always knew what to do and I…"

"Have faith baby," She answered as she slipped one of her hands under my arms resting it on my midsection. My heart ached as I watched her pat my stomach gently, "for you and your little ones because the night doesn't last forever."

I knew what she was trying to say, "But what if the dawn doesn't break?"

"Then follow the light of the stars and they will always bring you home." She answered softly, "You're a strong Omega, mon ange so don't let anyone tell you otherwise." This time it was said sterner, "Not even yourself."

It was then that my voice caught in my throat as I hugged her, "Okay Mom." I whispered finally as she started to disappear before my eyes.

Just as she did I awoke in my bed finding that I wasn't alone. "Morning Natalia…couldn't sleep?" I muttered with my mother's words still in my head.

She looked over still half asleep with a matter of fact tone, "Your bed is warmer."

"Well I'm in it so that might something to do with it." I said with a yawn and an arm stretch. And as I did she inched closer to me as Gabi stirred at my feet. My motherly instincts kicked in as I gave her a halfhearted smile, "Come on its warmer right here." I said with my arms open wide. She didn't have to be told twice as she curled up into my chest as Gabi took her side, "We have another ten or so minutes anyway."

"Thank you Alfred." She said as she snuggled up to me before she fell asleep again.

I laid there awake just running my fingers through her long hair. It couldn't have all been a dream right? Or did she come to me in my hour of need? It wasn't the first time and I hoped it wouldn't be the last.

Years later I would finally turn to my brother and ask him if when he was in trouble during and after the war if our Mother had visited him. He would surprise me by saying no. While he could feel her presence at times she never came to him. But then that might have been because our father was there instead. It wouldn't be a while more than I would feel that presence around me and when I would…I knew instantly it was him.


	28. Arbor Vitae

Natalia watched me as I got dressed, "Alfred?" She asked wrapping the blanket around her tighter for warmth, "Can I ask you a few questions?"

"Sure." I answered as I bent down for my belt. My mind was still on the night before and what my mother had told me.

"Well…" She said as she looked towards the door, "What's your brother like?"

It was something while I wasn't expecting didn't take the smile off my face, "Well he's a kind, strong Alpha that would make a good Mate one day." I heard her snort slightly as I looked her way, "What? Not what you meant?"

"Not exactly. I wasn't asking because I was interested in him." It stung when she said it, "I was asking if all Alphas are like him."

It was a strange question really; no Alphas are exactly the same. Even Ludwig and Gilbert while both could be neat freaks with the same eating habits were unique. "Well I don't know. He respects Omegas like my mate did but really I don't get your question." I shrugged slightly as I struggled to get my belt on, "Sorry."

"No it's fine." She said, "But…he seems mature. Maybe that's what I'm getting at."

"Mature? My brother?" I said with a light hearted laugh, "I guess he is. Wasn't your brother um mature?"

All I got from that was a shake of her head, "Can I ask you something else?"

"Sure I guess." I noticed that her eyes never wavered from a spot on the door. "What's on your mind?"

By then I had gotten use to many of her quirks. So I was prepared for some bleak idea of life or death but again she surprised me more. "What's it like to be pregnant and to mate?" Only then did she look away from her spot on the door.

"Ah, guess your Mom didn't tell you the joys of mating either?" It came with a soft laugh as I sat down next to her, "Well it's hard to explain really. Mating gets rid of a lot of the discomfort you feel during heat and being pregnant…well that can vary." Gingerly I took her small hand into mine, "Do you want to feel the pup?"

"It's too small to feel, I doubt it could…" She stopped once I rested her hand on my belly, "It's really in there." Her eyes widen in awe before tears threated to fall, "Alfred…"

I hugged her quickly knowing that she was about to break down, "Shh." I quietly hummed as I ran my hand up and down her back, "It'll be okay, you'll have a family too someday."

Her shoulders shook as she hugged my neck with all her might, "It's not me I'm worried about." She hiccupped, "It's my brother I'm worried about. I don't care if a damn Alpha looks my way but he deserves to find love, to have a family, to have a life."

It made my heart ached for her, we were so much alike. We both wanted our brothers to be happy but what she confided in me about her brother completely broke my heart. Her brother while a towering man had the mindset of a child. He was an innocent and naive man according to her and would never hurt a fly. In fact the reason he left the army was because he was told to go home. Did I completely believe that? No, but I knew she believed it heart and soul.

"And he will." I told her once she had calmed down, "He will have a life." Giving her a grin I kissed her forehead. While I could tell she didn't like it she didn't shy away from me. "But you do deserve someone too you know."

Again Nat sighed, "No one's as good and kind as my brother so why bother?"

It was clear that her mind was made up as I stood up and took her hand, "Well if it helps you can be an awesome aunt to my kids."

"What?"

"Well you and Toris already take care of them on Sundays when I'm working and I do see you as a little sister of sorts so," I grinned as she quickly got dressed, "I don't see why they can't call you Aunt Natalia."

It was as if I said her brother was set free because the next thing I knew she was hugging me tightly as she kissed my cheek. "Thank you Alfred." She said sweetly as Matthew knocked on the door, "Yes Matthew?"

My brother slowly walked in slightly confused, "Did I go to the wrong room?"

"Nah bro she just spent the night so what's up?" It's when I saw the letter in his hands, "That for me?"

He slowly handed it my way, "Well the post man said it was."

I took it and read that familiar writing, "Damn." I whispered as I quickly opened it and read what it said. "Mattie…"

"What does it say?"

"It says that those shitty Judges want to have a word with all the Mates. To probably just parade us around some more." I growled out wanting to rip up the paper.

Thankfully Mattie stopped me. He took my hand as he gave me a smile, "Alfred they want to get all their facts straight."

"Yeah? Then where's Nat's? She should be there for her brother." I growled out, my anger wasn't at him but really the whole situation.

He sighed, "Al you can ask him when you talk to him or them I guess." He looked down at my hands, "So when is your date?"

"Looks like in another month or so but still." I let out a groan noticing the time, "Shit, Nat we have to go if we want a seat."

"Right um I'll go head." She said as she raced out. She was still upset and this just added to it.

I lingered behind to kiss my kids a good morning, "Want to talk about it?" Matthew remarked as I fed Julia her breakfast.

"Not really."

"Al it's eating at you."

"Well…" I sighed, "Yeah it is but I'm trying."

"I'm trying too." He answered, "Tomorrow why don't I take your place and you stay here?"

"What?"

"I mean it Alfred. Natalia and I will go and you will stay here and I don't know have them make pictures or play with them." He crossed his arms as Cain let out a laugh, "And that's final."

"But…."

"Alfred." It was clear that he wasn't going to budge on it so I sighed instead, he had a point whether I wanted to admit it to myself or not.

"Okay but for now I have to go." I kissed both my children's heads before I hurried to the courthouse. "Mommy loves you two." I said as I waved them goodbye.

"Bye Mommy!" Cain said with pride as he waved his hardest and my little girl smiled before tucking her head into my brother's shoulder. How I hoped they won't hate me for being away for so long. They were my world and as I made it to the courthouse I sighed. They were as well as the one I was carrying.

Alpha, Omega or Beta, either way it was mine and I loved it as well. "Hey sis did you save me a seat?" I yelled out above the crowd.

Hearing far off in front an answer, "Yes now hurry up."


	29. Black eyed Susans

It wasn't until I spent the next day with them did I realize how much I missed my kids. It sounds horrible but I let my life get consumed by the trial and all the madness around it. I forgot to be a mother but I vowed I'd never let anything come between them and me again.

So as another month dragged on, followed by another I let Cain come with me when I would have to go to court or work. He loved every minute of it, because that was our time together. Now I'm not saying I didn't find time for my little girl, we'd go for a few walks and I'd read to her every chance I got. Maybe that's why as a young woman she's a slight bookworm.

So eventually I'd take her with me too to the bookstore. I'd sit them in the back in the children's section and leave them alone to explore their little world. It was okay since Sunday afternoons were normally slow days and half the time it was just me and the owner's Omega sister.

Lily was a sweet girl, and while she was small and soft spoken she was strong willed. "Alfred?" She asked me on late Sunday afternoon around the time I was about four months along. "Do you mind if I step out for a moment?"

Really I couldn't help myself as I gave her a big grin, "Oh is your boyfriend coming to see you?"

"Alfred, hush."

At that I let out a deep laugh, "So he is coming to see you. Well than I'm sure our resident Alpha will be able to protect the store while you're out playing Juliet." I winked at her, which got both an eye roll and a light laugh.

"What am I going to do with you?"

"Well you could tell me his name. Or her name, I don't judge really."

At that she kissed my cheek, "I know you don't but I also know you have a rather large mouth sometimes."

"Hey that was one time and I didn't know I wasn't supposed to tell Vash." I remarked pretending to be offended. I knew she was simply teasing me but I was slightly concerned that she was going somewhere alone.

She waved me off as she grabbed her coat, "I'll tell you eventually." But as she opened the door she looked back at me, "I should be back in an hour or so."

The look on her face gave me a slight pause, "Do you want me to come look for you if you're not back by then?" As she opened her mouth to say something she quickly shut it as she shook her head and ran off. It didn't take a rocket scientist to see that she was doing she shouldn't be but I didn't want to race after her just yet. No I'd give her that one hour just in case I was letting my mind get the best of me.

As the fifty minute mark came around my mind had already made a few dozen reasons why she wasn't still back. Most of them completely insane but still that didn't stop me from eyeing the door like a mother that just let their Omega go on their first date.

Finally at an hour exactly she opened the door and raced into my arms. Quickly I embraced her, it was clear that something was wrong. "Alfred…" She cried out as she held on to my shirt, "Please call my brother."

Before I could ask why, the front door opened again as a tall Beta male walked in as if he owned the place, "Can I help you?" I asked never taking my eyes off of him as Lily's grip on my shirt tightened fearfully.

He sniffed the air and chuckled, "Yeah I was trying to ask this lovely Omega out on a date."

"She's not interested so please leave."

"Why don't you let her decide that." He growled out as he took a step forward, "So move aside bitch."

Lily shivered but slowly I pulled her away from my shirt and advanced towards the Beta, "What did you call me?"

I knew he wanted to take a step forward but I already had his path blocked so he glared up at me, "I called you a bitch now move your fat ass before I move it for you."

My hand balled into a fist, "Okay I'm giving you one more chance to leave Dude or-"

"Or what, Bitch?" He found out a split second later when he was on his ass with his hands covering his bloody nose. His eyes started to water as he looked up at me in shock, "You…you hit me."

"You're damn right I did." I said as I pulled up him by his collar and pushed him out the door, "Now get the fuck out of here or the next time you'll be dealing with our mates." With that I slammed the door shut and sighed. "You okay Lily?"

She nodded rapidly now her eyes full of tears. "Alfred…"

After hugging her I kissed the top of her head, "You're okay. He was an asshole and I'm sure he won't be back."

"Thank you Al…" She whispered as she kissed my jaw.

"You're welcome sweetie just be careful next time you sneak out." I said as I picked up my children, "And I'll see you next Sunday." I joked as I gave her a warm smile, "And you'll tell me who your boyfriend is?"

Finally it got me a smile as she saw us out, "Yes I will…thank you again Alfie."

To me it wasn't a big deal but to my little co-worker it was something incredible and if I had to do it all over again I would have in a heartbeat. The only difference I would have done was that I won't have done it in front of my children.

My brother wasn't too thrilled that I had done that but I really didn't care although he'd tell me about it for most of the week. That Wednesday was like most, Toris had gone in my place so I could stay home with Mattie who had gotten a slight cold. I think it was the only reason he stopped talking about it, I'd make him soup if he would drop the subject well at least for the day he would.

Just as I handed him his lunch the doorbell rang. "Bet that's Vash here to tell you how stupid you were…"

"Didn't we have a talk about this? I made you soup."

"You opened a can and don't lie to me cause I'm blind not deaf."

While I wanted to mutter something I knew his ears would have picked it up so I just sighed and went to the door. "Coming." I said as I was a few feet away what I heard made me sprint to the door.

"Well hurry up Lad I want ta see these kids of yours."

I threw open the door and hugged him tightly as he chuckled, "Uncle Scott."

"Aye Lad it's me." He hugged me in return as he smiled, "I came as soon as your last letter came ta me. Now where are these grandkids and Nephew of mine?"

"They're in here." Really I didn't want to stop hugging the man in front of me, "Thank you for coming…" I whispered quietly.

My Uncle gave me a warm smile as he ruffled my hair, "Lad we're family. I won't just ignore yah." He picked up his bag as I let him in, "No matter what happens alright?"

"Alright." I smiled as I lead him into the living room not knowing if he'd do one last thing for me, "but…"

"Lad I'll talk to the Judges if I have ta." It was like he could read my mind, "Just tell me the day and I'll wear my good suit." I didn't know what to say as he walked over to my brother and touched his hand, "Hello Matthew, it's been a long time lad but I've heard so much about yah." His smile grew fonder as he sat next to him, "I'm your Uncle Scott…"


	30. Marigolds

"Mommy are we gonna see the Judge man today?" Cain asked me as I took his hand while I led him towards the second floor of the court room. My Uncle was to my right holding Julia with my brother walking behind us holding tightly to Gabi's leash. I slowed my pace as I looked back at him making sure he wouldn't get lost in the crowd thankfully Gabi wouldn't let that happen as she guided him along the hallway, "Is he a nice Judge man?"

"Hmm?" I answered looking down at him, "Well I don't know my little Dude but you'll be staying out here with Gabi and Uncle Mattie." His face dropped as he looked back at my brother, "We'll be done in a few minutes than we'll go out for dinner with Granddaddy Scott."

My Uncle chuckled as he handed off my daughter to Mattie, "It's just a lot of talkin' Lad. This way yah get ta see all the people goin' in and out." He knelt down do my son and whispered, "That way you'll know who is who. An Alpha's greatest strength is knowin' how ta spot friends and foes." With a wink he stood back up and led me into a side room where we were to meet one of the judges.

"You know he'll be thinking about that all night now." I said with a chuckle as I sat down at one of the tables.

"Best thing the boy can have is an imagination. It'll do him good when he gets older." He answered as he sat next to me. "So you ready for this?"

All I did was sigh as I shook my head, "As ready as I'll ever be." I didn't want to see that Berwald but at the same time I didn't want to speak with any of the others.

He took my hand and squeezed it, "It'll be over soon Lad."

It was true. The trial itself won't last for more than a few more weeks but I was dreading the outcome. "I know…" Just as I muttered it another door opened as a slender Alpha woman walked in. My Uncle quickly stood and I followed suit.

"Oh please sit this won't take long." She motioned for us to sit back down as she took long strides to her own seat across from us. "I don't try to make it too formal when we're out of the courtroom anyway." While her smile was sweet I saw a hard coldness in her eyes. "So Mr. Alfred your mate is Gilbert Beilschmidt is that correct?"

"Yes it is and Ludwig Beilschmidt is my brother in law." I shifted slightly in my seat as she gave me a glare behind her thin rimmed glasses. "Ma'am…"

"Did you mate with him before or after the war started?"

"After."

"Before or after you made it across the border?"

"After…but-"

"Why did you go across the border and was he already on the run from our military when he met you?"

"Excuse me but I think I can answer that." My Uncle saw past her kind smile and sweet voice the moment she had walked in. So while he knew I could answer my own questions he had a feeling it could and would become a witch hunt. "My nephew had just lost his mother, god rest her soul. So he was on his way ta my home just across the border. He met up with the young men in question and they agreed to do the Alpha duty and escort the lad to safety."

Her blank expression never changed as she turned her questioning back to me, "You returned when?"

"When we were asked to return…"

"Were you with child?"

"Yes my first."

"And it is what?"

"It? My son is not an it. He is a healthy nearly five year old Alpha."

"Is it your only child?"

It was clear she said it on purpose by the way she smirked at me. "No," I started, "We have two other children. One three year old Beta girl and the one I'm carrying."

"Well actually the court doesn't take might be children into consideration so one more child."

"What do you mean might be children?" My Uncle at this point was slowly standing as he kept one hand on my shoulder. I glared back at her trying to keep my anger under control. It was what she wanted, after all and I was falling for it.

Just as she looked down to write something in her notes she said something I'll always remember, "For all we know the one you're carrying won't make it to term. I mean all this stress and all that business in the court must be doing a number on your body." She smiled wickedly as she leaned in close, "It's quite common to cause still borns actually."

I couldn't have heard her correctly. My mind while going a mile a minute and I couldn't make any words come out of my mouth. "E-Excuse me?"

Lucky for me my Uncle had finally had enough, "We're done here." He said as he pulled me up by my arm, "You'll be hearin' from my lawyer."

"It's a simple fact Mr. Kirkland." She smiled at him as if she didn't say anything wrong. "Especially since we've noticed that he's been absent from his normal seat. I mean his mate as noticed as well."

What she said after I have no idea, I stopped listening as I walked out of the room. Uncle Scott stayed behind but I couldn't do it. I would have hit her but that would have only given me few weeks in prison.

It wouldn't have solved anything but I bet I would have felt great for that split second. As I was about to get lost in my thoughts a kick hit me in the gut, making me smile, "Yeah…I know you're still there my little hero." I turned just to feel my heart stop. There talking to my children was Berwald.

I nearly broke out in a sprint until a voice called out to me. "Don't do it." I stopped cold as I felt a presence around me, it was different from my Mother's. It was fiery and strong. "Calm down than go over there." The voice in my head said. It wasn't my voice though; it had a clear accented voice I hadn't heard since I was five. "Just lead them out Alfred. Matthew will follow and your Uncle will join you soon."

I nodded as I walked over, if I finally lost it completely I had no idea but I was going to do what my father told me to. "Hello Mr. Jones." Berwald said quietly as he looked up from speaking with Cain. "You're boy as quiet an imagination."

"Yes he does." I smiled as I picked him up in my arms, "Excuse us please…"

He took my arm, "Is something wrong?"

While Matthew couldn't see it he raised feeling the tension in the air, "No sir." I answered as I took back my arm. I was surprised how quickly he let it drop at that.

"I see. Have a good day Mr. Jones." He simply smiled at me before walking down the hallway. "Goodbye Cain." He said as he rounded a corner.

My son waved goodbye, "Good bye Mr. Berwald."

"What was that about?" Matthew asked as he walked out with us, "What did the judge say in there?"

"Nothing…" I replied as our Uncle caught up with us. "Nothing at all."


	31. Gladiolus

"She said what?" Lily asked in an anger I've never seen from her before.

I sighed putting a few books up on a high shelf, "Yeah but please don't tell anyone." I said looking back at not just her but my other friends turned family. "No telling Mattie what she said."

While Toris and Feli didn't know what to say Natalia shook her head, "She's just upset because her kind is infertile."

"Natalia."

"What? It's true Feli." Natalia sighed, "But then my judge was just as bitchy."

"Berwald?" I asked but she shook her head.

"I heard he didn't talk to any of the Omegas." Feli said as he jumped up on the counter, "He just walked around the courthouse talking to the children."

For a moment I felt some relief, "So it wasn't just Cain."

"No."

"Feli how do you know all of this?" Toris watched him as Feli picked apart a small daisy, "You weren't there all day like some of us where."

"True but I have my ways." He smiled sweetly as the petals continued to fall, "But I will say he does like you Alfred."

"Funny cause I don't like him." I crossed my arms as I leaned on one of the bookcases, "There's something about him I can't place but I've seen those kinds of eyes before…"

"Was it another Alpha?"

"It was…" I tried to dig deep into my memory as the others talked around me. His blue eyes were shaper and colder but when I remembered I let out a slight gasp.

Instantly Natalia was by my side, "What? Is the baby okay?"

"What? Oh yeah she's fine but Feli do you know if Berwald has any brothers? Uh Alpha brothers?" It finally had clicked who had those eyes.

Feli slipped out his phone as his fast fingers glided over it, "I'm looking…he has a few brothers actually."

"One named Abel?"

He looked over his screen again, "I don't know…I'd have to look on another site cause it doesn't say if he does." After a moment he looked up, "But I'll find out by tomorrow."

"Or we could find out right now…" Toris motioned towards the door, "Because that looks like him right now." The door opened shortly after he said it and sure enough there he was standing in the doorway.

He was dressed slightly more causally but he still had that look of authority around him. "Hi Mr. Berwald." My son said in a chipper voice from his spot in the children's section. "Is you here to buy some books?"

The tall Alpha shook his head, "Actually I'm here to speak with your Mama." His gaze turned to me, "Hello Alfred."

I saw Lily in the corner of my eye walk towards her brother's room, "Hello Sir." I forced a smile as he walked up to me. It was only then that I realized how tall the man really was. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Your son has a very unique name." He said simply.

"Well he's named after a friend I met during the war." I looked back at my son as he watched and smiled.

Berwald nodded, "Hmm. I see…"

"Is there a problem here?" A new voice asked as Lily's brother enters the store. While being a much shorter Alpha, Vash wasn't a man to back down. "Because unless you're here to buy something I'd like it if you leave." He crossed his arms as he glared in Berwald's direction, really the only reason he was so hostile was because of what had happened a few weeks prior. So since I defended Lily he'd do the same for me, whether I needed it or not.

Berwald didn't blink, "Alright." He said before he turned back to me, "Correct me if I'm wrong but Cain killed Abel."

"He did but Abel loved him until the very end." I answered as I watched him go, "But what was your point?" That he didn't answer as he left. Sadly I should have remembered sooner as well as Abel's last words to me but that wouldn't be until I was once again sitting in the court room. They would have saved me the heartache that was to come.

The final day of court arrived and we were there early that morning. It would take most of the day due to all the Alphas being sentenced. I had some hope as a few early on was sent free but it was quickly dashed as more and more where given jail time. Some ten years, others up to forty. While a few unlucky men were given death sadly this included Natalia's brother.

I swear I could hear her heart shatter in a million pieces as I held her close if only to stop her from lunging at the judge that sentenced it. "Alfred…" She said through her tears, "I hate them."

"I know." I said quietly as she hid her tears in my chest, "I know Nat…"

Towards the end of the day out came my mate and his brother and instantly I started praying. "Ludwig Beilschmidt while you did leave the military," One Judge said as the courtroom quieted down, "The court's opinion is that you had all intentions of returning. And it was only due to outside influences that caused you to leave. So we find you not guilty and you are free to go."

My heart skipped a beat as a smile grew on my face. Gilbert turned back at me as he slapped his brother on the back as he walked off towards the doors. They wouldn't let the Alphas stay inside while the others were being sentenced so he went to wait just outside the door.

Gilbert mouthed a quick I love you before turning back to face his fate. "Gilbert Beilschmidt." Berwald said as he stared at my mate. "As a Captain we expected better of you, and since you forced others to join you in your desertion followed by the fact that you left the country shortly afterwards. The court has no other choice but to sentence you to a term of no less than fifty years and no longer than your natural life." He stopped as I let out a muffled scream but he refused to look at me as he banged his gavel.

As the officer started to take him away I stood up as I done seven months ago, "Gilbert!"

"I love you Bluebird. Take care of our kids." He said with that same smile that I feel in love with.

At that moment I didn't care if they threw me out of the courtroom, "I love you too." I yelled out as one judge told me to be quiet, "Tell me your mother's name."

He shook his head, "Name her Annabelle."

"Annabelle?" I asked as he was pushed out the door but not before I heard him say yes.

It wasn't fair as I found myself forced out of the courtroom and sat down on a bench across from the large doors. While Feli explained to Ludwig what happened I just stared at a small spot on the wall. I understood completely why Natalia would stare at spots at that moment.

When you feel completely numb and don't want to break down screaming you focus on a spot until the feeling passes. But when the shock wore off I found myself running to the bathroom and puked what little I had in me up. I didn't care if the others followed me but for that moment I wanted to be alone.

Sadly I wasn't. When I unlocked the stall door and walked out there he was washing his hands. "Alfred…"

"Save it." My eyes narrowed, "He didn't do a damn thing wrong yet you destroyed his life for no reason."

He let out a loud sigh before shaking his head, "It wasn't my decision."

"Like I believe that."

"Believe what you want." He grabbed a towel and wiped his hands, "But can I ask you something?"

"What?"

As he turned off the water he looked at me in the mirror, "Is my brother dead or is he hiding somewhere?"

In that moment I understood, my mate wasn't found guilty because of that but because he couldn't find and convict his own brother. "Yeah he is dead. He died thinking of you and the rest of your brothers."

It was the first time I saw real surprise on his face as Abel's words came back to me, "What? That idiot, he…where is he buried then?"

Half of what I said next was out of spite as well as I felt like he'd just simply want to know so he could go piss on Abel's grave. "Go fuck yourself." I said as I opened the door, "He's in a pauper's grave but that's all you'll get from me."

"Alfred.."

What he asked me I don't know since I slammed the door on his face and didn't look back. I didn't have time for any more questions anyway since I had a life to piece back together. It would be hard but…I wouldn't let this destroy me.


	32. Plum blossoms

Annabelle, such a random name really. Well to me at the time it was but when he yelled that out it made perfect sense to both him and two others in that courtroom. But while to me it was random I did like it so when my little Omega was born it was the name I gave her. She was born with a little crown of white hair and her eyes were as deep crimson as her father's. It nearly brought me to tears seeing how much my little angel reminded me of my mate.

"My little Annabelle." I cooed softly as I kissed her head. Her Uncle watched from the doorway, "You can come in Ludwig. Not like you haven't seen this before." It wasn't hard to tease him about it and his face turned a soft shade of red.

After a moment he recovered as he sat by my bed, "True but I'd rather forget that…"

"Well I didn't know it was labor when it started." She let out a whimper as I said it, "So do you want to hold her?"

After a moment of hesitation he took her into his arms as a soft smile grew on his face, "She looks just like him."

"Yeah she does…" I said quietly as I touched her leg, "Ludwig, who was Annabelle?" I had asked him a few times before but he would change the subject but now I had him trapped and he wasn't going to get away from my question.

After a deep sigh he looked at me, "She was our sister."

"Sister?" I racked my brain before remembering a conversation years ago when I first met them. It was a random conversation but it was the reason why Gil would call Abel a bastard. "What happened to her?"

When he shook his head I knew what he was going to say, "She died just before the war. She was actually Abel's mate."

"What? Why didn't he ever tell me he was mated?" I said as I sat up as some of the pieces started to fall into place. "And that he was my brother in law?"

Ludwig handed me my daughter back as she started to cry, "Because he was only mated to her for a few weeks before she died." He sighed as he ran a hand through his hair, "It was sudden and it was easier not to talk about it but it crushed Abel."

"Is that why he didn't stay behind or leave?"

He nodded, "It was easier since we were his family at the time."

"Yeah…" I nodded, "Did you ever meet his family?"

He shook his head a Feli poked his head in, "Gil did but I never met them. I knew he had a few brothers though." He said as Feli took his hand. "Yes Feli?"

My soon to be new brother in law smiled, "I'm sorry but can I steal you away for a moment?" He had a twinkle in his eye that I knew all too well.

"Go for it Dude." I said with a warm smile, thankful that at least one of my Alpha brothers was going to be mated. Once they were gone I looked down at my daughter and smiled, "Well my little Annabelle looks like it's just you and me for the moment."

She stared up at me before she gave me a yawn that made me chuckle, "I'm sorry am I keeping you up?" I held her close to my heart, it was still broken but it was slowly mending itself back together. I was already thinking that I would take her to see her father the moment she was old enough and he would wrap his arms around her and kiss her little nose. So as a small tear fell and she closed her eyes I started to hum my mother's song to her.

That song got me through a lot of months than years. Slowly I added to the song to make it my own. Just like the garden I had started growing since we moved in. At first it only had Iris and two rose bushes both for my mother and slowly but surely a whole colorful garden burst to life. Queen Anne's lace for my Uncle, Carnations for my two brothers in law, Lilies for the Omega that would be my sister in law and large sunflowers for a man I never knew. More would be added including forget-me-nots that clung to ivy that wrapped around my porch always reminded me of Abel.

In fact I was trimming a section of it one day in early summer when a young man walked up on my porch. He was slightly older than me with short blonde hair and blue eyes, "Mr. Jones?" He asked as I stopped and turned my head, "Um…my name is Emil."

I pulled off my glove and shook his hand, "Hey Emil you can just call me Alfred." I gave him a smile thinking that he was another lawyer or aide that was working on Gilbert's case. "Do you want a glass of ice tea or something?"

He shook his head as he looked at the growing ivy around us, "But can I talk to you about my brother?"

"Brother?" I asked my mind going to Toris who was inside cleaning at the time. "I didn't know Toris had a brother."

He blinked confused, "No my brother's name was Abel."

"Oh you're Emil." I answered crossing my arms as I leaned on the door frame. "So did Berwald send you?" It was three years since I saw the man but I still had a burning hatred for him at that point. "Because I told him to find the grave himself."

"No." He answered as he shook his head, "No one sent me, but he did tell me you were…with him when he died." Emil looked away as he continued, "And…did he suffer?"

I knew at that moment why he was here so I sat down on my swing and motioned for him to do the same, "No he didn't suffer. He knew when it was his time and I was there so he didn't die alone either."

Slowly he joined me on the swing, "Did he say anything about…me? Or any of us?"

"Yeah he actually did." I smiled softly at the beta man, "His last thoughts were of you and all of his brothers. He told me about when he'd collect fireflies in jars for you and how much he loved you." I reached out and squeezed his hand, "Abel hoped that one day you guys would be together again."

He squeezed my hand back tightly as he nodded, "I remember that day…" He said quietly, "He got in so much trouble."

"But he said he'd do it again just for you." I could tell while he might not have wanted a hug I gave him one anyway. "He was a good Alpha. He was a damn good friend and a wonderful brother."

After a moment he returned my hug, "Thank you Alfred." He muttered softly, "He was a good brother…he was loud but…"

"He always meant well." I finished. "And I know I'm not the only one that misses him." He nodded before he stood up to leave, "Come back any time Emil." I said as I watched him go, knowing deep down that he only wanted answers and that I was the only one that had them, "We can swap stories."

"Thank you Alfred. I might be back." He called back before he was gone.

Sadly he didn't come back nor did any of his brother come either but one day three weeks later someone else came to see me while I was in the garden. I was watching Annabelle as a butterfly fluttered around her before it would land on her head, she would giggle wildly and it would fly off only to return a few minutes later. "Friend, Mama."

"Yeah he is." I laughed as a shadow appeared behind me, "Oh hey Ludwig. Quick go grab the camera this is adorable."

Suddenly the shadow wrapped it's arms around me and the scent hit me, "After I hug you my awesome little mate."

"Gilbert!" I yelled as I swung around as I embraced him as hard as I could. "What the hell? What are you doing here? How did you get out? My god did you escape?"

He laughed as Annabella raced over to him, "I'm too awesome to say behind those bars forever." He said as he kissed me, "I thought it would be a nice surprise though so."

"You still didn't answer me." I said but really I didn't care. "How?"

"How, there'll be time for that my blue bird." He picked up our youngest as he pulled me up to my feet. "I'll tell you all about it tonight after I well show you how much I missed you."

I opened the door as I kissed him again still in disbelief, "I missed you too but,"

"I'll tell you everything I promise. Hell I'll go back to the beginning if I have to." He said as he closed the door behind us. "I'll even tell you about my Mama's favorite flowers if you want."

I grinned as I hugged him, "And I'll tell you about mine."


	33. Epilogue

Alfred smiles as he put his cup down, "And well that's my story I guess. Not really much of one but it's mine."

"Not much of one? You did a lot…" The young beta says turning off her recorder. "I mean wow Mom. I didn't know any of that."

He shrugs slightly, "You knew your Dad went away but you and Annabelle were so young that you didn't remember."

"No I meant everything else." Julia looks down at a few of the notes she wrote while her mother told his story, "Did you ever go back to…where you buried Grandmother?"

Letting out a soft sigh Alfred stares out the window for a moment, "I think that's for another time baby."

"But did you ever see Kiku or Antonio again? And when did you stop hating Berwald?" She stops her questioning when Alfred kisses the top of her head, "But Mom…"

"Another time sweetie I promise and again I'll tell you everything I can but I want you to remember something…" He starts as he puts his coffee cup in the sink.

Julia stands up as she gathers up all her notes, "What?"

"That was my memory of what happened. Some people might say your father should have stayed in prison or that the war wasn't as bad as it was or that it was worse. People remember what they want and from that we get history."

"But what if they're wrong?"

"Then they're wrong. If anything my Mother taught me that life doesn't last forever, it's not about who's right and wrong but what we do with our lives that count." He kisses her forehead before he lets out a yawn, "Now I think we should both go to bed."

"Okay Mom, good night."

"Good night honey. I'll see you in a few hours." Alfred knows his daughter will probably stay up to see the sun rise before she goes to bed. While he'd love to do that he'd rather be in his nice warm bed with his mate instead.

Just as he opens his bedroom door he sees a small halo of blonde hair in his spot, "Scotty what are you doing in Mommy's bed?" He whispers quietly shifting the five year old over.

"He had a bad dream." The Alpha mutters half asleep next to him, "So I told him he could."

Slowly Alfred slides into bed holding his youngest tight, "Sorry go back to sleep."

"Who needs sleep?" Gilbert chuckles as he opens his eyes wider, "So did you tell her everything?"

"Everything I know so tomorrow why don't you tell her your side."

"It's not as interesting." He answers kissing Alfred deeply, "Plus I don't want to scare her."

Snuggling into the warm blankets Alfred shakes his head, "You won't just skip over the mating parts like I did."

"Aw but those are the best parts." He laughs quietly as he pulls his mate and son into a warm embrace, "But you're right I'll be gentle."

"Thank you."

"Mommy I'm sleeping…" The young blonde cries out as he yawns.

"Oh I'm sorry baby. Go back to sleep." Alfred kisses the top of his head as he starts to fall asleep, "Goodnight Gilbert."

"Good night Alfred." Gilbert says as he watches his mate fall asleep. He had heard most of the story his mate had told and some were a shock even for him especially what all those flowers actually meant to his mate. As he closes his eyes he makes a note to buy a few Irises for his blue bird. Flowers may not be his thing but they've always made his Alfred smile and hopefully when he lays them on Alfred's mother's grave they make her smile as well.

**A/N: Hey guys Cat here. Thank you for all those who read and reviewed my story. Sorry if my boys got a little OOC. See y'all in the next story. One side note to add after thinking about it I will be adding a sequel to this after. It should be up in a few days. **


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